What To Do When It Feels Like It Is All Falling Apart

[00:00:00] Jamie: I have a sexy podcast topic to talk to you about today, which is what to do when it feels like it’s all falling apart. I’m joking. It’s not the sexiest topic of all time, but it is a much needed topic, right? Because how many of you have set desires, goals, manifestations, and you feel like. What the heck is going on?

[00:00:30] Jamie: I feel like I’ve set this desire, and it seems as though I’m going in the opposite direction, and it feels like everything’s going wrong, right? And it just feels like one thing after the other, one obstacle, one challenge, one life circumstance after the other, and it can feel really overwhelming. And the most important thing I want to share is that this does not work.

[00:00:53] Jamie: mean that you’re doing it wrong. I really don’t want you to add fuel to the [00:01:00] fire and tell stories like, well, maybe I’m manifesting wrong. I must be doing it wrong. There’s something wrong with me. I’m broken or I must be thinking the wrong thoughts or I’m in the wrong vibration, right? Whenever we think those things, then we get into resistance and we don’t actually use this experience.

[00:01:18] Jamie: And this experience, when you’re really, In it, when it feels like things are falling apart, when you’re in a season where it’s like, God, this sucks. I’ve been there y’all. I have been there, but there is so much to gain from it, right? So we’re going to talk through on this podcast, how to soften into that experience, right?

[00:01:47] Jamie: How to not. How to not resist it, how to not add fuel to the fire and make it worse, and also how to let this experience evolve you into the person that you want to be, and [00:02:00] how really, truly, this experience can be the thing that actually catapults you forward into the life you really want way faster than if it hadn’t happened.

[00:02:15] Jamie: Right? And this is the truth. Life is a contrast. The human experience is a combination of darkness and light, of joy and sorrow, of, you know, right? Life is opposites. The human experience, the, you know, Earth realm is 50 50, right? We experience contrast. We wouldn’t know abundance without scarcity. We wouldn’t know joy without sorrow.

[00:02:46] Jamie: We just wouldn’t, right? So that’s what’s happening when we’re really going through something. There is such an opportunity for healing on a massively deep level [00:03:00] of building new characteristics and, um, this strength and resiliency within yourself that’s actually needed to evolve into that next version of yourself and to hold so much more.

[00:03:15] Jamie: You’re building emotional resiliency. And again, I know it’s not sexy. It’s not the way we’d want to do it, right? If we could pick, we don’t want to go through heavy, hard things. But we also don’t have a choice. Sometimes it happens. It happens to me. A lot. Right? And I, I wanted to talk about this on the podcast because I know I’ve talked about a lot of wins and a lot of amazing things that I have called into my life.

[00:03:45] Jamie: And I don’t want you guys to, um, think that everything has just been completely easy without. Obstacles that I had to work through without blocks happening on the timeline that I wanted. That’s not [00:04:00] the case. Oftentimes I’ve actually had to heal a lot in order to create those things, right? I’ve had to work through obstacles or blocks in order to get to the place where I could manifest it.

[00:04:15] Jamie: And challenges have happened. Flops have happened. Fails have happened that have actually allowed me to live even fuller into this amazing life that I have now, right? And, and obstacles still happen. And I’ll, I’ll touch on that for sure. And just share with you, because I really want to share it all. I want to share the wins, but I also want to share the opportunities for learning and the full experience of this, you know, life and of having a business.

[00:04:49] Jamie: And here’s the thing. If you have a business, I just want to say I acknowledge you, right? I really do. I mean, [00:05:00] it’s no joke. This is why I love working with entrepreneurs because entrepreneurs are so courageous. You know, it’s like we’re creating something that we’ve never created before. Most of the time there’s not a streamlined path.

[00:05:15] Jamie: We’re kind of carving our own path. We’re stepping into the unknown. We’re putting ourselves out there in a big way. We’re being vulnerable, right? And it’s like, that’s not easy. That is not. You know, easy for the ego. It takes so much to do it. And it’s one of the most amazing personal development and spiritual experience of my lifetime.

[00:05:41] Jamie: At least it’s such a great opportunity for growth. But again, sometimes when you decide to manifest something, some things are going to go wrong. And you’re going to have challenging seasons or challenging years or life things are going to happen. But again, I don’t want you to make it mean [00:06:00] that you’re not doing it right or that you’re not manifesting properly.

[00:06:04] Jamie: Because sometimes, things have to fall apart so that you can rebuild them in a way that’s even better, that’s stronger, that’s more resilient, that’s more aligned than you could have ever imagined. And sometimes you wouldn’t be able to build that what my client, um, says bigger and better life, right? If you didn’t go through.

[00:06:34] Jamie: Those challenges and those obstacles. You wouldn’t even know what the bigger and better life was, right? So a lot of times alignment comes from misalignment, right? And lightness comes from dark. So, We don’t want to resist those moments. And I want to talk you through what we can do to work through it. Um, and even for me, like, I want to just [00:07:00] share a personal experience.

[00:07:01] Jamie: Last month, I was in it. It felt like everything was falling apart. Not everything, but a lot. Like, to the point where at the end of the month, One of my teammates checked in with me and she’s like, how are you doing, Jamie? So she sent me like an audio. I, I sent her one back. I said, you know, girl, at this point, I am literally just laughing.

[00:07:22] Jamie: I was like, I cried. I worked through it. I processed it. I was in depression and now I’m at the point where I am literally just laughing because it was one of those months where it was like, could one more thing possibly go wrong? Like everything that could have gone wrong in this launch. Went wrong, right?

[00:07:41] Jamie: And it was a launch that like I put so much intention into, and I invested so much into in so many ways with time, with my team, I invested in new copy and a new sales page and new design, new email sequence, a new pre launch. Like I went all [00:08:00] in on it and I thought this is set up so well. We had my full team working on it.

[00:08:06] Jamie: We had everything prepped ahead of time. I even wrote them in Slack. I said, you guys, even if nothing happens, it’s a win that we prepped ahead of time. I probably should have said if nothing happens, right? Because, oh my gosh, from that moment forward, no, I don’t believe in jinxing anything. And I, I’m not about that, but it’s kind of funny because Right after that, like one thing after the other started happening, right?

[00:08:30] Jamie: My ads account got shut down just randomly, completely shut down. Like, nope, no more running ads. You can’t use the word money. So we’re like, okay. So I got about like half the people in the event that I normally do. We had, oh, I got sick. I got super sick. And like, this is one of my biggest launches of the year.

[00:08:51] Jamie: One that I typically am just like So excited about and love being so involved in and I got so sick. I could barely [00:09:00] talk. I showed up for the bare minimum, but I had no more energy beyond that. We had so many mishaps behind the scenes. I had had a new team. So there was. You know, new things that were, it was, it was just, let’s just say mistakes were made that were very unfortunate that really affected the launch and it was super challenging, right?

[00:09:25] Jamie: It was not what I expected. In fact, I think I hit 17 percent to my goal, which is probably the lowest I’ve hit in a very long time. Right. In terms of like, What my goal was compared to what I did, um, and I had to really work through it. And it just felt like every day something else would come about. And then I had life things happening too.

[00:09:47] Jamie: I had a friend that went into the hospital. I went to visit him. Did it, it was unknown in terms of if he was okay. It was just, it was one of those times where, you know, and I’m sure you’ve experienced this where I was like, [00:10:00] God, like one more thing. I can’t handle a universe, please. No more. Right. And thank God my friend is okay now, I’ll say that, but in the moment, it was really scary and this isn’t the first launch that I’ve experienced something like this.

[00:10:15] Jamie: I’ve had a launch where my grandpa passed right in the middle of it and I was in the middle of launching and, you know, I put it all aside and flew, you know, to his funeral and was processing that and it was so scary. It’s so sad and so challenging, but other launches where just life circumstances happened, right?

[00:10:34] Jamie: And this happens in business. It’s when, Oh my gosh, we’re supposed to show up for this thing, or this was the expectation and this is what life is presenting, right? And it’s contrast. It’s like, wait, this wasn’t part of the vision, but it doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. Oftentimes there’s something really beautiful to learn within that or to take [00:11:00] from that.

[00:11:00] Jamie: And I’m not saying we wish it would happen, right? Some of these circumstances can be really challenging. Maybe you’re going through, you know, a separation or a divorce. Maybe there’s a loss in your life. Maybe there’s an illness. Maybe you’re having challenges with family members. Maybe there’s a big transition happening, right?

[00:11:21] Jamie: Maybe there’s a natural disaster and you’re like, wait, how do I show up to life and work through this? And maybe it’s smaller things like what I just went, you know, like what I had, where I was like, Oh my gosh, this happened. And then this happened. And then this happened and this happened. Or maybe you’re struggling with insomnia and you’re also trying to be really present for people and really trying to grow your business.

[00:11:43] Jamie: Right. Like. We’re in the human experience, guys. That’s it, right? And there’s going to be obstacles that come up along the way, and not everything is going to go perfectly. But here’s the thing is that what [00:12:00] I have found is that in hindsight of every big challenge of every what I felt like was a dark night of the soul or every just, you know, time where I maybe I had a really challenging year or a really challenging season by the time I finally work through it and I work on my healing and I get support.

[00:12:24] Jamie: And get to the other side of it, it’s always so much better than I could have imagined. Because on the other side of those things, I find that that is where the most creative ideas come up. You know, like I’m even thinking this past month where I said, God, that was really challenging. But now that I kind of work through, I process the emotions.

[00:12:50] Jamie: I’m looking at the beauty in it and I really see it. First of all, I’m like, I love having an intimate group. I really do. It’s a lot of fun. Cause I get to be like, [00:13:00] so hands on with them. It gets to be a really tight knit group. So, and I’m like, Oh my God, I’m so excited to like over deliver. And it’s going to be a different kind of experience than I’m used to.

[00:13:11] Jamie: And so I’m really soaking in the richness of that where I’m like, I haven’t had an experience like this for a while. Right. So. That’s fun, right? It’s almost like one on one coaching, but with a small group, right? I get to like really coach the heck out of people. So I’m looking for the beauty in it. And this is something that it can be helpful to do, harder to do right when you’re in the middle of it or right in the disappointment of it.

[00:13:35] Jamie: But you can always ask yourself, you know, just check in, be like, does it feel like I’m gaslighting myself? If it does, it means you probably need to process the disappointment first, process through some of the emotions, but. Ask yourself that question and sometimes you can find it and when you get through the main bit and process it emotionally Usually you can always see what is the beauty in this, [00:14:00] right?

[00:14:00] Jamie: What is the light at the end of the tunnel for me here? Um, and

[00:14:09] Jamie: Yeah, like I said Like almost all of my best ideas. I’m thinking of the money manifestation movement, right? My program that I love so dearly the soulful six figure mastermind. Like I’m thinking of all my programs. They actually all came out of challenges like out of something else not working out and I’m like I came up with the idea right and It’s after I process something, it’s like usually that’s when a big insight comes or an idea or another way of doing it, right?

[00:14:39] Jamie: I remember after I went through burnout, after making my first hundred K and feeling like, God, this is not what I thought it would be. And it was so disappointing. That’s when that insight of, Maybe there’s another way, right? It was like, I can’t do this anymore. It felt like everything was falling apart. I was depressed.

[00:14:59] Jamie: I was burnt [00:15:00] out. I was just not enjoying myself. And it was in that moment that I was like, there’s gotta be another way. And that’s when I decided to infuse this manifestation piece and infuse slowing down into it. And I realized, God, there’s some healing to do. I need to learn another way of doing business.

[00:15:21] Jamie: And that insight changed my life. It changed my business. It changed the entire trajectory of my business. It was needed to get where I am now. But in the moment, it didn’t feel good at all. In the moment, what I thought I’m gonna, I would pick this. No, not at all. I was thinking this sucks. I want to be anywhere but this.

[00:15:44] Jamie: Right? So it’s usually in hindsight that we can see the lessons and the learning. But what I want to Just remind you of if you’re in it, and if you’re not in it, I love that for you, and you can save this [00:16:00] for if you ever are in it, or if you ever do experience a disappointment, right? You can come back to this podcast.

[00:16:06] Jamie: Because these are the things that I want you to remember when you’re in it. Number one, life, it’s made up of contrast, the human realm, the human experience is made up of contrast. So no matter how much pain you’re in right now, no matter how much despair or darkness or heaviness, I want you to know that there is an equal and opposite on the other side.

[00:16:31] Jamie: That if you work through this and if you push through and you just keep going, You will get there and the opposite will be there for you, right? And that’s why we say there is a light at the end of the tunnel and that light shines bright, right? So just know that there’s so much happening for you right now if you’re in it.

[00:16:57] Jamie: And right now you are [00:17:00] building up emotional capacity. You’re building characteristics that, like, that future self that you manifested and intended into the world needs in order to be there, right? Right now, you’re doing that work. You’re healing on a deep and cellular level. Healing doesn’t always feel good, right?

[00:17:20] Jamie: It doesn’t. Sometimes it’s hard. Like we have to hold space for big feelings, for big emotions, for things that we’ve got to work through. And it’s so important to love yourself through it, to hold yourself with compassion. And that’s why I don’t want you adding to it by saying you’re doing something wrong because you’re absolutely not.

[00:17:42] Jamie: What you’re doing right now is you’re building up strength that you need. You’re building up resiliency. You’re leaning into courage. You’re having to move into surrender because there’s probably no other option. Right. Just like what I said last month, I [00:18:00] said, I’m just going to laugh at this. I got to that point where it’s like, okay, universe, like what is happening?

[00:18:06] Jamie: Right. I was just like, Really? You know, it gets to the point where you just kind of almost have to laugh and surrender into it and say, okay, I will take my hands off the wheel because obviously trying to control this is not working, right? Jesus, take the wheel or whatever, right? Higher power, take the wheel and guide me, right?

[00:18:30] Jamie: And oh my God, usually we are guided, not usually, always, we are guided. To somewhere even better than you could have even imagined. Right? So that is really something to remember. So I just want you to hang on. Alright? Just hang on. Not too tightly. You don’t have to like, try to control this anymore. But just hang in there and know that on the other side of this, [00:19:00] Something incredible is happening for you, right?

[00:19:03] Jamie: What you have manifested is there for you, and even brighter and better than you can imagine. And I always say whenever it comes to manifestation, we have to let go of the how. That’s because Because we couldn’t possibly know how all of this is working out, how the universe is putting this puzzle together, but it is.

[00:19:25] Jamie: And this here, what is happening for you is part of that, right? And I also want to say this, if you’re experiencing something really challenging, like loss or something like that. You didn’t manifest that, right, in order to get where you want to be. It’s just that this is a part of the human experience that we all experience, right?

[00:19:49] Jamie: And so if you’re going through it, you might as well heal along the way. So that on the other side of it, right, [00:20:00] there is beauty, right? And that there is something that you can release that maybe you’ve been holding on to for your life that you can free yourself from. All right. But I also don’t want you to sit here and say, well, I must have manifested this thing so that I could heal so that I could get where I wanted to go.

[00:20:17] Jamie: That kind of thinking isn’t useful. Like, here’s the thing, never use manifestation against yourself. It’s just like we say, don’t use coaching tools against yourself. There’s no reason for it. It’s not necessary. And it’s not true, right? The universe is actually a loving place. Like I’m not, Like, you know, you are actually a loving being and you’re a human being and you’re going to go through human stuff, but we might as well use this human stuff to learn and grow and evolve.

[00:20:48] Jamie: Right? Okay.[00:21:00] 

[00:21:09] Jamie: So I want you to think about your life and look, look back at the things that Maybe at one point in your life, you felt like, felt like things were just falling apart. Like, everything. Maybe it was just a really challenging thing you went through. Maybe it was a season. And I want you to think about that and think, Okay, in hindsight, what came from that?

[00:21:36] Jamie: Right? And what way did I maybe use it? I know for me a lot of the things that I felt like were falling apart on the other side of it, so much beauty came, like, you gotta look at what was the 50 50 of that, right? What was the the challenging, the heavy 50% and what was the beauty in it? Because in the human experience also there is beauty in everything.[00:22:00] 

[00:22:00] Jamie: So we wanna find that and we want to believe in that, right? So here’s the thing. If you’re in it right now, I just want to say I love you. I see you and, you know, you’re amazing and you can get through this and I want to encourage you to hang on and I want you to believe in beauty and believe in possibility and believe that there is light at the end of this.

[00:22:30] Jamie: So keep Going, you’ve got this, you’re amazing. And also, I am a huge, huge, huge advocate of support. So I really want to encourage you not to try to DIY this healing experience. If it feels like things are falling apart, Get support. Let yourself receive that gift. It’s [00:23:00] so nourishing. And find support in a way that you can right now.

[00:23:04] Jamie: In a way that maybe you feel guided to be supported. Even if it’s just a friend that you reach out to every week. Or maybe you start therapy. Or maybe you start working with a coach. Or whatever it is you’re guided to do. I really want to encourage you to seek that. Support. I know it can feel vulnerable.

[00:23:26] Jamie: It can feel scary. It can feel, again, that’s something where we have to move into the unknown with support, right? But I’ve seen firsthand so many people, whether that be people in my life or my clients, That when they let themselves receive support, the healing happens with so much more grace, with so much more ease, right?

[00:23:50] Jamie: It’s almost like just having this big hug, having this comfort that’s over you so that you don’t have to Try to do it all yourself and get through it [00:24:00] yourself. So that’s my last PSA for you. If you are in it, let yourself receive, right? Get some support. Get some help. And you’ve got this. And I totally see you.

[00:24:14] Jamie: And I promise, on the other side of this, there’s so much beauty.