Tuning into Your Intuition & Finding Alignment with Teresia

[00:00:00] Jamie: Hi everyone. I have a super special guest today that I’m so excited to interview and hear more about her story where someone she’s someone that I recently met but have been just so inspired by And I wanted to have her on the podcast and hear all about her story. And then we’re going to talk about retreat because we recently met at the New Year’s Manifestation Retreat.
[00:00:29] So I have her here. It’s Teresia Kiyangi. Welcome to the podcast. Can you share a little bit more about you and what you do in the world, your businesses?
[00:00:43] Teresia: Okay. Uh, thank you, Jamie. It’s, it’s such a pleasure, privilege to be here and I really do appreciate you having me on. Um, so, uh, I’m Teresia. I am a life coach for women.
[00:00:57] And, uh, my, [00:01:00] uh, goal, purpose, mission is to help women have the courage to really design, create, um, life. And by dream life, it’s you need to really focus on doing what you want to do and really pushing yourself to live the kind of life that you imagine secretly, uh, but too afraid or just don’t think you, uh, have the audacity to live it out loud.
[00:01:31] Jamie: How long have you been coaching?
[00:01:34] Teresia: So I started my coaching journey a couple of years ago, really ramped it up last last year. And this year I’m all in and really serious about it. So it’s been a slow journey, a slow ramp up. But, um, my whole orientation in 2024 is about going all in on my coaching business.
[00:01:57] Jamie: Oh my gosh, I love it. Yes. [00:02:00] How, I’m curious, how did you get into that business? What was it about that niche and working with women? Um, and helping them live their dreams. What, what was it that inspired you about?
[00:02:19] I
[00:02:19] Teresia: think, uh, with us coaches, uh, our life shows up in our business and the things that we struggle with show up in the, the kind of business that we want to have and the way we want to help women. Um, I, I always say that the way my career has shaped out in my life, I’m 46 right now is I kind of. Meandered through different careers.
[00:02:43] I was a chemical engineer at one point. I worked in public health at another point and found myself in nursing as a nurse practitioner. And I think with each stage, um, it was a frustration of something being missing and I was motivated to move to the [00:03:00] next stage seeking. Seeking the thing that just, you know, it’s almost like a dress that doesn’t fit and each career just didn’t quite feel like it was fitting.
[00:03:10] And, um, when I got to my space as a nurse, I realized that, wow, I can do the science stuff. I’m a good student, really good student. So I’m good at that. But the thing that really makes my heart sing is when people. You know, sort of give you the privilege to, to see and be part of their life, deep private spaces in their, in their own human experience.
[00:03:35] And you get to support them in there. And I realized that that’s the part that I really love the most. And that’s the part, unfortunately, in our medical system that is engineered out. Our medical appointments are shorter and shorter and shorter. I’m sure everybody, uh, you yourself experience it when you go to the healthcare setting and the thing that I, I felt helps people get to go with their health and with their lives is, is in the [00:04:00] coaching bit and, you know, then I went through a divorce of my own, found, um, coaching, uh, really found the life coach school, which is where I was trained.
[00:04:11] And, and. It just made sense that the thing that excites me the most is this thing called coaching that I didn’t even have language for. Yes. How
[00:04:22] Jamie: did, how did you find it? You
[00:04:25] Teresia: know, I was, I didn’t even, you know, when I, I was, um, I was married for about 18 years. And when it came to an end, I was really in a horrible place emotionally to a point where I couldn’t even recognize myself.
[00:04:45] There was once an incident that happened that just jarred me into action, which is when I was like, look, this marriage is not working. You are unrecognizable emotionally. And this is rock bottom. [00:05:00] And you got to figure out a way out of it. And that’s what happened. I enlisted a group of people. There were some key friends.
[00:05:08] I was like, no window shopping friends. That’s what I said. You people who are here, it’s like a board of directors and you’re holding space for me the entire way and helping me get to a place that I recognize. Thank God. I have some other friends. Unbelievable girlfriends that I’ve known since I was a little girl, since I was 13 years old, that really helped me through that space.
[00:05:29] So I found podcasting. I literally at that point, maybe five years ago, didn’t even know. I mean, I knew of podcasting, but I never really listened to anything. And I was scrawling and scrawling and just found Brooke Castile on the Life Coach School and just listened and listened and listened. And you know, that moved to different People, um, and you know, then I enrolled in the school and that’s actually when I also first saw you, [00:06:00] um, doing some of, um, the webinars in the school.
[00:06:04] And I remember looking and seeing you and just saying, huh, like, I always feel like I, I, I stumble, I pay attention to things that just make my insights perk up somewhat. Right. And you were one of those people that just made me. I didn’t understand manifestation, but I do know that from a little girl, I’ve always been guided by intuition, but I didn’t know that’s what it was called.
[00:06:29] You know, people will look and say, you know, she’s headstrong and she does exactly what she wants to do. And I, I would always listen to my in internal voice when I was younger. I think when I got married and had kids. I dampened that voice a lot and this part of my life is really coming back to that voice, paying attention to myself and starting to create the life anew for me, which is really what I help women do as well.
[00:06:58] Jamie: Yes. [00:07:00] Oh my goodness. I love that. And it’s so interesting because my story is similar in that I kept trying different, well not different careers, but I went to college for one thing and then I, you know, went to makeup school and I thought I wanted to be this big freelance makeup artist and I felt like, Okay, there’s part of this that’s right.
[00:07:20] And then there’s something that’s missing within it. Right? Like, it was like, oh, like, I got to my dreams, but this is missing a little something. And it sounds similar to you. Whereas, you know, being a nurse practitioner, I’m sure there was a piece of it in there. But like you said, you couldn’t like fully do what you’re here to do within that.
[00:07:40] And it’s so interesting how I do believe we have like these little, it’s like when you set that intention, like you did with your, um, your girlfriends, like you said, and having these strong support around you and set that intention for growth or for evolving or, You know, [00:08:00] whatever it is, the, it comes, the teacher arrives.
[00:08:03] Right. So that’s so cool that you, I also, that’s how I found coaching was just almost through the pain of like doing, being in something that felt so unaligned. And then. Coaching was what I found to help me out of that, but then through it, of course, fell in love with it. So, I love that so much and I love that we had a little soul contract, obviously.
[00:08:26] Yes,
[00:08:27] Teresia: yes, yes, yes. You know, can I say something really quickly? I think that, Yeah. The one thing that, so I know we’re going to talk about the retreat, but I think what the retreat, it’s interesting that you are helping me put language to a method that worked at the beginning that I lost sight of. And now I get to rebuild it and recreate it, but really understanding the mechanisms of what success was like for me, um, back when I was really young.
[00:08:58] Um, [00:09:00] so, One of the things that, oh, gosh, and I knew it was going to happen. I just lost sight of it. Oh, this idea of, um, Really having the courage to keep going and never being satisfied with not being satisfied, right? That if something is off, it is your responsibility to show up for yourself and keep digging and keep asking questions.
[00:09:27] That’s. I’ve never been okay. My body has never allowed me to be okay. Settling for something that’s not in line with, I think, my mission here on earth. So what it looked like in a 10 year marriage when I was really not listening to my intuition was growing and growing emotional discomfort. You know, for me, it was anxiety and then it moves into panic attacks and then it’s just out of control.
[00:09:53] And I think that is my body just saying you are not aligned and you gotta figure it out, like stop horsing around [00:10:00] and figure it out.
[00:10:01] Jamie: Oh my gosh. Yes. And our bodies are so brilliant where it doesn’t feel good. Like being out of alignment, right? We’re like, we do not want this anxiety, but then in hindsight, it’s like, Oh, now it’s my body talking to me.
[00:10:16] Yeah. So you have really mastered this. Skill. And I know, I’m sure this is probably a huge piece of the work that you do with women as they are going after something bigger and better and going after their dreams, which to me, like you said, is listening to that inner voice or what you would call intuition.
[00:10:35] Right? So I want to dive a little bit further into that, especially for those listeners who are in a place that like where you were, where you said you were out of alignment, you were out of alignment in a career, out of alignment in marriage. Maybe not totally sure what was out of alignment, but it was manifesting as anxiety, panic attacks, and something felt off, right?
[00:10:59] What [00:11:00] is the process? I’m curious for someone who’s in that place. To start tuning in and start understanding that or being able to start hearing their intuition. Are you, like, what was the process for you? How did that happen? How did you open up to it?
[00:11:18] Teresia: So I think I’m going to, before I talk about the process, I think, let me, let me mention what it looks like when you’re not.
[00:11:26] Paying attention. That’s perfect. Um, you know, for me, look, I left home at 13. I, I, at 10, I was like, listen, this is not working for me. I’m out. So I am a human that, you know, I’m a woman who, um, is courageous and I, I, I, I, I follow, I follow my heart. Right. And, but when you start off that young. And what I felt by the time I was graduating from college, [00:12:00] um, you know, I grew up in Tanzania, um, went to boarding school and really fought to, like I applied as an 11 year old to go to boarding school, go to boarding school.
[00:12:09] And, you know, in that place just was really lonely and wished I was home, but I was so determined to accomplish what I wanted to do. So the method was kind of off, right? Um, you’re following a vision, but I really, I think I didn’t really understand as a young child the emotional part and supporting myself emotionally.
[00:12:31] So what it looked like was finishing college, you know, coming out to the United States, getting a scholarship, going to college for a degree in engineering away from my family. And, and what it looked like is really being burnt out at a really young age and not even knowing what that was. Right. And so by the time I get this job, I’m with Gillette company here in Massachusetts, so proud of myself, you know, like you did it.
[00:12:59] I was so [00:13:00] tired, but I didn’t recognize that’s what it was. Then comes, you know, my, my ex husband, and I think that, I got married probably for all the wrong reasons when I think about it because of where I was emotionally at the time, the way I evaluated the person I wanted to settle down with was based on someone who was sort of emotionally, um, exhausted.
[00:13:28] Right. And then you, you get married, you have kids and very responsible around my children, like I love my boys and I’m, I’m so determined to create this, this life for them. And I take my parenting really seriously, as you can imagine, you know, very thoughtful, very careful, very firm, but kind. And it’s a, it’s an interesting balance and they, they teach me so much.
[00:13:51] And I hundred percent threw myself into that work all the while. neglecting me, right? [00:14:00] Neglecting my needs. Right. And you get so busy, you know, you’re really busy. Like the model of parenting here in the United States, there’s not much support. Even when I compare it as an African self, there’s really such limited support that it’s so easy for women to lose themselves in the In the day to day of just schedules and just doing and doing that, there’s no time for yourself that if you don’t actively create a mechanism for you to take care of yourself and pay attention to yourself, your, your life, especially if you have Children, um, is not going to do it for you, you know, so it’s, it’s, it’s, I think it was.
[00:14:41] I did the design. When I look back, the way I had designed my life was not one where I had time to really pay attention to my intuition and be guided by what I want to do and understand that my taking care of me and [00:15:00] being on mission for me is not mutually exclusive for my parenting, my ability to love and care for my kids.
[00:15:06] That I could do both. Not at this fast rate, but you could carve out time to pay attention to yourself as an individual as your needs. So then I think you hit, I hit a wall, you know, when you are in the business of doing what you’re not aligned, emotionally aligned to do. It becomes emotionally difficult and I’m sure the way I was showing up in my marriage at some point wasn’t great.
[00:15:32] And then you have two people who pull apart and I’m desperately trying to parent desperate. Like I felt like there’s that, uh, I think there’s some fable or kid story where there’s a guy, a little boy with a dam and putting fingers in a dam to try. Yeah. I like, I felt like all fingers were just desperately trying to just hold this structure and it just wasn’t working until it stopped.
[00:15:56] Literally stopped working, right? [00:16:00] And I was down and I couldn’t do it anymore. So that’s my story, but it is not a unique story because I see this story a lot as a nurse practitioner. I had so many women coming in their thirties, in their forties, just not sure. And it shows up as anxiety. They feel unsatisfied and I would sit there listening to them and I’m treating the issues.
[00:16:25] But just. I recognize the similarities in our story that we are struggling and we just don’t know how to make it stop and fix it because you’re supposed to be fixing it while you’re juggling things. Yeah. Right? Well, like your kids are still boring. You still kids still have their needs. So how the hell do you carve out space where you can even think?
[00:16:48] I remember just wanting to be able to think can everything just stop so I can think and put things together. So, um, So that’s the scenario. That’s how it looks [00:17:00] like when you’re in disarray and dysregulated, right? As, as, as, as, as a woman, for me, what change looks like, it’s not what I thought it would look like it.
[00:17:13] Um, looking back, the, the pace is much slower. Uh, the things that you can tackle a much less. Right? The last thing I learned is I had been working and operating in a clip that is just not aligned for me. And I’m still learning that. My to do lists were bigger than I was humanly capable, me, Teres, an individual Teresia, more than I had the capacity of doing.
[00:17:44] And then I would constantly be criticizing myself for not accomplishing the things instead of understanding that that was too much to begin with, right? I would be frustrated as anxiety and panic [00:18:00] attacks were creeping in, which essentially is, you know, even depression. Like for me, it was a combination of depression and anxiety, which I think is really deadly.
[00:18:08] Um, you. It is really an illness of not being able to cope. You cannot cope with the clip of your life. But what I would do is imagine as a nurse practitioner, I couldn’t even diagnose myself, yet I’m diagnosing other people. Um, but for me, um, what I would do is be frustrated that why can’t you do the things that you were doing five years ago?
[00:18:36] Instead of recognizing that. It was too much then. And now you’ve really worn down your body and it can’t handle it. So it was never even a good idea back then. Right. Right. And here you are frustrated that you are trying to turn the wheel and it’s just not moving. Right. So for me, it’s a lot of just [00:19:00] stop, right.
[00:19:01] And rest. Get you sleep in there. slow the hell down. Like it looked like not having goals for a little while. Like I remember for a while it was like, all right, we’re separating. That’s all you’re doing this year. And you’re divorcing. Don’t do anything else. But then there’s that part of me that’s like, what do you mean?
[00:19:24] Don’t do anything else.
[00:19:27] Jamie: From that where I’m sure the momentum was still running where you’re like, Hey, what? Like I can only imagine coming to a halt after being You know, in that energy with the massive amount of to do’s and being a mom and having a full time career and, you know, just having that all the, all the things that you were, you were going through, was that hard to just
[00:19:52] Teresia: rest?
[00:19:53] It’s, it’s hard now. You keep coaching me on the same thing.
[00:19:59] The [00:20:00] momentum that I’m so thankful that I’ve joined, I think it’s, it’s, it’s hard. For me, slowing down is an effort. Like I write to do lists and I force myself to slash it in half, slash it in a quarter. Even for my business, I think that I am, I am doing it again, where I am over ambitious and then whipping myself all the way, because I’m not accomplishing this ridiculously ambitious plate, right?
[00:20:29] Not getting that there is growth in slowness. A lot of growth when you take it slow.
[00:20:37] Jamie: Yeah. Oh my gosh. 100%. And you, I mean, I know because I coach everyone on this and I’m also, you know, very much in that conditioning where I consistently have to coach myself into slowing down. This isn’t something we were not taught to rest.
[00:20:52] We were not taught to slow down. It’s like more, more, more, do more. If you can’t, there’s something wrong with you. Productivity, productivity, [00:21:00] productivity, which doesn’t work. Even if it works, If it works on the what we call the R line or you get the result or you hit the goal, it does not work energetically.
[00:21:10] You will get there, but you will be exhausted. And I’ve been there, you’ve been there. So I’m curious, as you have consistently been doing this practice of slowing down, Resting. I love what you said. Cutting the to do list in half. What have you noticed has changed?
[00:21:34] Teresia: So I think what’s interesting is when you’re in the business of running yourself to the ground, being okay feels really like foreign, like it feels like there’s something wrong, right? When you’re so addicted to worry and stress. And, you know, I think when you’re doing it so much, and that becomes the normal, maybe, maybe [00:22:00] addiction, being addicted to it isn’t the right word.
[00:22:01] But when you’re when you’re, when you have created a life where it’s normal for you to be overstressed, you know, constantly worried and thinking about lack that I haven’t stressed. You know, every day is about what you’ve not been able to accomplish, right? It feels very strange not, like it feels like I’ve done something wrong, you know, that’s what it feels like.
[00:22:27] And, and me, um, some of the things I love about what I’m learning with you is this idea of, um, You know, um, being able to emotionally regulate yourself, right? And figure out ways to calm yourself down. And for me, it’s learning that that is okay, that that thing that seems so strange and weird, that’s actually okay.
[00:22:50] That’s the thing that you want. You want to be calm. You want to be purposeful, right? You don’t want to be frazzled. You know, [00:23:00] you want to be deliberate. Yeah.
[00:23:02] Jamie: How do you notice things changing? Either in your business or in terms of how you think differently now or your creativity, anything, is there anything that you notice different when you allow yourself to slow down and you like, as you are calming your nervous system and really reminding yourself that it’s safe and it’s okay to slow down and it’s okay to rest and it’s okay to be thoughtful.
[00:23:30] Do you notice anything changing in terms of,
[00:23:37] Teresia: I, I think that a frazzled mind is really inefficient. Right. And when I am, you know, I think, uh, this week I was, you coached me on this idea of, um, You know, [00:24:00] when, when I’m relaxed, my brain is able to be really creative. Like I have all these ideas. I’m constantly talking to myself. I have ideas when I’m showering.
[00:24:10] I’m constantly recording on my phone, but when I come to actually create the product with these ideas, when I sit at my desk and become all formal about how now we’re going to expand on that idea. Suddenly it’s like my brain doesn’t work and it’s just, you know, it’s just turned to molasses and it’s just.
[00:24:28] The gears are not turning. I think the thing that I’ve, I’ve learned, uh, and I’m, I’m still learning, right? It’s something that I, I still have to practice. And it’s something I’m learning from you that these are active practices that you take them or whatever method you choose to keep it present with yourself, be it mantras, et cetera, is, you know, you figure out your way of keeping it front and present that this is the thing I’m working on.
[00:24:53] Um, for me, it’s just, yeah. The constant reminder. It’s the same thing. I always like to lose. [00:25:00] Use the example with my kids because I think I do a good job with my kids. And so when my kids were young and didn’t understand something, I just redirect. We’d redirect and we’d redirect, right? So I can do it lovingly with my kids.
[00:25:12] But somehow with me, it becomes what’s wrong with you. Do better, right? And so I keep my method is, you know, Keep first pay attention to my emotion. I know they my body is very good about telling me some things up. I may not know the thoughts that are creating those feelings, but I do recognize when I’m having feelings.
[00:25:38] Right? So it’s just pay attention if it’s not feeling good. then you are responsible for figuring out why, right? Like that alone is a huge game changer. Stop doing stuff that doesn’t feel good. Right. Or stop using methods that just don’t feel good. Yeah. Right, it may have worked for [00:26:00] so and so, but that’s not, if it’s not feeling good, don’t do it.
[00:26:03] Cause your body’s telling you something, that’s not your thing. That’s not your method. Yeah,
[00:26:08] Jamie: 100%. And I think so many people in business have been just conditioned to believe. Oh, I just need to push through that. Right? Oh, you know what I mean? And like, I know I did that for years and I ended up burnt out because of it.
[00:26:22] And I just don’t think that it’s. You know, it’s taught that like you can actually tune in and listen and if something doesn’t feel good, if there’s a lot of resistance, you don’t have to do it. You can slow down and figure out why. Um, it changes everything, everything. Absolutely. Yeah. So if, if you were talking to someone who was in a place like you, where, you know, let’s say they’re in, they have a business You know, my audience is entrepreneurs and let’s say that they have been pushing through for years and it doesn’t feel [00:27:00] fun.
[00:27:00] It feels heavy. It feels like they’re not making traction, but there’s a huge list of to do’s and they know that if they just follow the schedule or do this thing, they feel like they’ll be successful, but it just doesn’t feel good inside. And there’s anxiety and, and Just like you said, something feels off.
[00:27:19] What would you say the first step is before getting to the place of burnout, right? From the wisdom that you’ve gained. What would you say the first step is to be able to tune into your intuition if someone’s in that place?
[00:27:38] Teresia: I think for me, the biggest step is always, and again, the, the, my most recent, recent big thing is, is my separation and divorce.
[00:27:48] Right? Yeah. Um, that was a big deal. And
[00:27:55] I remember the day where I just accepted it’s not working. [00:28:00] It was an unremarkable day. I kid you not. It was, there was nothing special about that day. It just dawned on me that it really is, is not working. There is, it’s not working. You just be honest and accept it. You haven’t failed. You haven’t succeeded.
[00:28:22] It’s neutral. It’s just not working. And is this the way you want the rest of your life to be? And That just, I call it a reckoning, like really being honest, if you are not getting the kind of results you want, you gotta accept that there’s something about the way you are approaching it, or doing it, that’s just not working.
[00:28:48] Doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, it just means that that’s the truth. Yeah, you know, um, I’ll, I’ll say this one thing. I remember [00:29:00] I journal not every day, but I tend to journal when I feel very heightened emotions and I don’t know what to do with it. The act of writing sort of organizes my thinking. And I found a journal, um, that I wrote 10 years prior.
[00:29:18] In my marriage, and I kid you not, that journal had the same list of things that I didn’t like 10 years later when I was about to get divorced. Like, like to me, I’m like, wow. You wrote them, and you spent 10 years of kinda not believing what you were seeing, and hoping that some miracle was going to happen.
[00:29:41] You tried. You did this. Yes. The contrast is just so remarkable to me, that it’s the same list. It’s the same complaints. It’s the same thing. But it took 10 years for you really to believe it. And [00:30:00] my hope is, as someone who is 46, that the timeline between my truths gets shorter. that I get really much better in being honest.
[00:30:10] And it’s not about calling and cutting and throwing people out of your life. It’s just being really like you feel it when it’s just it’s not working, like this method is not working. And and figure out if you go down the path of then figuring out what an alternative can look like an alternative approach.
[00:30:29] Jamie: Yes. 100%. I think that’s huge. And I think sometimes, um, in the coaching world that both of us were trained in, and I was a coach instructor, so I helped train coaches. And one of the things that I would see is sometimes students unintentionally using coaching Ideas against themselves, right? Of like, Oh, this is the circumstance.
[00:30:54] This is the situation. It’s my thoughts about it that matter. I just have to change my thoughts or [00:31:00] trying to force some kind of circumstance to work, that’s not working right. And then blaming themselves if it’s not working versus for me, like. something that I’ve learned through this journey and it sounds similar to you, right?
[00:31:15] Sometimes it takes us 10 years sometimes, but then we learn from it. Right. And we’re like, let’s shorten that timeline for sure. Right. To change the circumstance that that’s totally okay. Right. And that, um, You know, for me, it’s like, I want to choose circumstances or situations that are just easy to have good thoughts about, right?
[00:31:37] And to me, that’s alignment. So, yeah, I think that’s huge as the first thing, accepting it and not making it mean anything. Anything about you, right? Nothing. It’s like, okay, I tried it and it doesn’t work. And oftentimes we’re given what we don’t want so that we can be directed to what we do want. And it helps us understand alignment even more.
[00:31:59] [00:32:00] So that’s huge. So step one, acceptance, right?
[00:32:04] Teresia: Yeah, absolutely. I will say, you know, the good thing is when I was down and out emotionally, I just didn’t have the energy to sort of fight the truth, you know, it just look at it and you’re like, okay, you know, you just, when you’re down and out, you just, you know, you just don’t have the energy to do the kind of rubbish you were doing before.
[00:32:27] Jamie: That’s true. That’s what happened to me in burnout. Yep, after I hit that first hundred K year and I was like, this is horrible. There’s no way to redo like, there’s just no way I’m redoing this. Right. It was like not an option. And the thing is, again, like these are the things that can teach us how to not get to that point where we’re just too exhausted to even like, care that something has to
[00:32:52] Teresia: change.
[00:32:52] Yeah, yeah, it’s like it’s not working and I’m not fighting it. Yeah, yeah. So you
[00:32:57] Jamie: mentioned in the beginning that you have this [00:33:00] strong inner voice that’s led you through the years. For you, how do you access that voice? How do you know that’s your inner voice?
[00:33:22] Teresia: There’s something,
[00:33:27] again, I’ll, I, for me, I, I always use my parenting as a, cause I think I approach parenting with a very balanced mind, right? I’m not in the business of trying to be my kid’s best friend. This is not like a, What is that like a pageant where I get a pro not even a pageant, like I’m not like I’m not comparing.
[00:33:46] I don’t care what other people are doing. I really am focused on these humans that have been brought to me. And how can I parent each in each in a way that helps them along the journey of being the [00:34:00] fully expressing the truth of who they are. And it looks different because they’re two different people.
[00:34:05] So I’m so clear and balanced with the way I approach it. So sometimes it’s my. When I am confused about me, I, I look to, I just imagine, all right, if this was one of your kids, what would you do? Then I’m like, Oh, okay. Yeah. I’m not supposed to be doing that. So with me intuition, I’m very grounded with that, with my kids.
[00:34:25] Right. I just know, like, I know, like, I’m very clear with what it feels. It feels calm. It feels strong. It feels, It feels like a deep knowing. It doesn’t feel boastful. It doesn’t feel like I’m trying to prove something. It just is fact. That’s how the voice shows up with, with me. Right. And how did I know it?
[00:34:58] I’ve had it [00:35:00] from when I was a little girl. I don’t know. They just was, look, I was a little girl who was looking around, I remember at 10 looking at my parents, and I love my parents, my father passed away, but I do love my parents, but I do remember at 10 thinking, oh, yeah, the adults in my life are just not guiding me where I need to be.
[00:35:26] And this is not going to work for me. Right. I remember that at 10. I remember when I had that thought, I remember looking at it and I’m like, Oh, wow, the grownups in my life, the leaders in my life are having terrible decision making, you know, and, and this is not where this is not the plan that’s meant for me.
[00:35:50] And. When I’m not in a good place, what it looks like is panic and anxiety feels totally different. It [00:36:00] just feels terrible inside. My intuition feels very grounded.
[00:36:04] Jamie: Yeah. Yeah. I love that. And I want to just like say this for anyone listening. I love the way that Teresita compared You know it to an area of her life that feels natural, right?
[00:36:19] Where you have a relationship with this area of your life, with mothering, with being a parent, that area of your life feels natural. Now that won’t be the case for everyone, but all of us tend to have some area of our life where like, This feels pretty easeful. This feels natural. And what I love about that is that we can, I don’t want to use maybe the word compare, but we can kind of compare.
[00:36:42] I guess that’s the word compare and contrast. Like, oh, how could I bring the way that I think about that area of my life. Into this area of my life that made me feel more challenging, right? So that’s huge. And then also using it as like, Oh, how do I hear my intuition [00:37:00] here? How can I translate that into using my intuition in my business?
[00:37:05] Using my intuition around, I don’t know, relationship with money, some other relationship. I think it’s so powerful to do that. Um, and when I’m coaching clients, I always think about that of like, okay, what area do you have a great relationship with? Is it with health? Okay. Think about how do you think about that versus your business, right?
[00:37:25] And when you do that, it can be so helpful to like, Start to intentionally transfer that energy into how you do another thing. So I think that’s such a powerful realization that you’re like, Oh, this is where I hear my intuition strongly. And let’s bring that. How can I bring that into business or wherever else?
[00:37:48] So good. Or into slowing down or into my relationship with myself. It’s huge. I love that so much. So
[00:37:57] Teresia: good. There’s something [00:38:00] about, um, like, um, like I’m always so surprised about how much I still need to learn about myself. And how we are never really, you know, we give people, people help you learn how to walk, people help you learn, but nobody really learns and teaches you how to be with you, how to understand what works for you, right?
[00:38:22] I think I feel like at this point in my life, I’m building a list of things of how Teresier does shit. Yes!
[00:38:31] Jamie: I
[00:38:32] Teresia: love that! Like, this is, this is, these are, you know, when you have, like, standard operating procedures, like, these are my standard operating procedures. Like, this is how I function. And I’m doing it by paying attention to what’s, what’s worked.
[00:38:49] I wish these are the tools I had. In my late 20s, when I was getting getting married and starting my family, because then I would [00:39:00] have understood what I needed the list of things that I needed to be okay. Right. And when I work with women, that’s really what we’re trying to draw out. It’s not all bad. It’s functioning somewhere.
[00:39:12] Right. Let’s try and figure out What how you show up and what the framework is for you when things are working and let’s apply that somewhere else.
[00:39:22] Jamie: So good. Yes. And that’s why I’m always talking to people about let’s find your unique manifestation. It’s not going to be the same as mine. Yours is going to be uniquely yours.
[00:39:37] And the only way you get it is by tuning into that, into what has worked, what hasn’t worked. Let’s avoid the things that haven’t worked into what does work for me. And I think that’s a powerful question to ask for anyone to really journal on that. Like spend a half hour and ask yourself this question.
[00:39:55] What does work for me in business? You ask yourself that [00:40:00] question or anywhere in life, right? But if you think about business, we talk a lot about business growth. So it’s like, if you ask yourself that question, you will reveal your business plan. You will reveal your manifestation method of how you manifest because manifestation is just creating.
[00:40:15] So, yeah, I love that so much. And that must be so powerful to do that with clients and to have You know, you as a coach there to help them really distinguish what that is. I can only imagine how incredible that is for them to have that. So good. So I would love to dive into Retreat because we really only met a month ago.
[00:40:39] I mean, you met me through like you said,
[00:40:43] Teresia: We met physically a month ago. I’ve been knowing you for several years.
[00:40:49] Jamie: We energetically were connected for several years, but we met in person at the retreat. And I know you took courageous action and said yes to the retreat. I’m [00:41:00] curious how that process was. What inspired you to come?
[00:41:03] Were you like into manifestation before, were you just interested in it? Tell me a little bit more.
[00:41:09] Teresia: So I think I’ve, I’ve always been. spiritual, right? These like, I’ve always had this belief. There’s something guiding me through, like, I’m not alone. And when I die, I just don’t disappear. Like, I think these something I think I’d argue with my mom, who is very staunchly Catholic as to what that something is today.
[00:41:32] But, um, they is I’m not alone. Like these an energy that’s here. That’s with me. And I’ve recognized it throughout, throughout my life. So when I also think that even the good, when things, when times are bad, everything in my life happens for a reason and for me, right, I think the part for me, I got from you for sure that it’s, it’s [00:42:00] happening for you, right?
[00:42:01] I was in the past, I’d say it happens for a reason. And every person I bump into, every person I’m interested in has something to teach me. Always believe that for as long as I can remember. So I saw you for the first time and there was just something about you. There’s something about, I have a very critical voice in my mind, um, that pushes and pushes and is quite relentless.
[00:42:29] And so you are in the way you present is anything but that. But you are, you create a space that’s very calm, very compassionate, but firm and honest. And you can prod. That method, just the first time I was like going, that’s what stopped me in my tracks because That’s what I long to do for me like I long to speak to myself in that way.[00:43:00]
[00:43:00] Right. And so I would always seek you out, you know, and seek out, um, um, again, your webinars, et cetera. But, um, I stumbled across your podcast last fall and I would go to bed listening to your podcast. Sometimes I’d binge, then I’d, you know, life gets in the way, then I’d come back. But then you announced this retreat and I heard it and something about, you know, I was like, you know, maybe a retreat would be a good idea.
[00:43:30] You know, you start 2024, you know, just, it just has a posture of how you’d approach the rest of the year. I think it was sometime in late November, like, I only had this, like, it just somehow the retreat came quite forcefully in my mind, and I thought I had missed the opportunity. So I’m scrambling. I think I came to your last, um, Um, webinar about the [00:44:00] retreat late, like it was crazy and I was just like, Oh my God, there you go again.
[00:44:05] You push things off, you, you, you, you feel a connection to something, but there’s a delay to you accepting that and work and, and, and, um, I’m taking action on it and. I just paid and it’s, I typically don’t do that. I normally sit and I think, and I overthink and then the opportunity goes. I just paid. I was like, you’re going to lock it in.
[00:44:29] And, and, and, and then I spent all of December thinking, what the hell you’re, you’re coming from a vacation. And then a week later, you’re going to a vacation. I was delaying and booking the flight. booking, like I was, I think I was booking all that the weekend before I showed up there, like really dragging my feet at one point.
[00:44:48] I was saying, well, maybe, maybe we’ll be okay. Just losing it. Like, it’s just the price of this. And I’m like, ah, you’re wasting. And you know, like. I dragged myself there [00:45:00] and, um, it was everything I had hoped it would, would be right. You, I remember I emailed you really worried about, you know, the room I’m like older and I just felt maybe, you know, your, your, your, your, your people just seemed a lot younger.
[00:45:18] And I don’t know why sometimes age, this always comes up for me. Um, but you know, it comes up for a lot of women at this stage too. Um, And so I remember emailing that to you. And then, you know, my background, I’m this Black woman with an African background. Like, sometimes I’m like, you know, you’re going to be in a retreat.
[00:45:36] It’s intimate. Is there going to be space for you? And I remember emailing you and I remember you had a very beautiful response back. Then I also remember telling myself that You know what? Just go. And, um, this is not the first time you’ve been the only one in gender, race, African background in a space.
[00:45:57] And, and you’ll connect with what you need to [00:46:00] connect with and just believe that. And if anything, it’s a vacation in San Diego. And so, so I went and it was a room with such inspiring women. And. I didn’t feel out of place. I didn’t feel like I didn’t belong. Um, then there was you and just your expert guidance.
[00:46:26] And just, again, you create a space of such deep thinking. Um, and I just love, I love the whole, I love the experience. I love the pace. It wasn’t rushed. I wasn’t doing too many things. Um, just really listening to you. And, and really mining my mind, uh, for information. That’s, that’s what the retreat was for me.
[00:46:52] It was such a special, special, um, experience. I think the thing that [00:47:00] I felt most is I would never have been able to receive this a year ago. I would never have been able to receive your words two years ago. I. Was exactly where I needed to be to hear, um, here and sort of draw in the, the experience in its entirety, you know, so it happened at just the best time it really did.
[00:47:27] Jamie: Oh my goodness. I’m curious with you being open and ready, which. Sounds like I mean with everything your intuition led you there to even just sign up like you said on the webinar and then go for it and I know how it is every retreat I sign up for I don’t know what it is but like the week before I’m like I don’t want to go even though it’s exciting but there is so much to do I don’t know should I just Skip it and take a week off.
[00:47:55] And then every time I go, I’m like, Oh my God, I’m so happy. I went [00:48:00] right. So, um, I’m curious what, since you were, you know, you were meant to be there and you were open to receive, what did you know? I mean, it’s a two day retreat, so it’s not long, but it is deep. You’re working. Yeah. Yeah. So I’m curious what.
[00:48:23] changed within you in those two days? Because I know I saw a shift.
[00:48:30] Teresia: So I remember coming, and I remember, um, I even said it on my first day introduction, I had this visual of, like, I feel like, like, I’m ready. I’m ready for my business. I’m ready. Like, I have everything in here to do what I need to do. Right.
[00:48:51] I am already seeing clients. I can see how I impact people. And so I’m just ready to be out there in a different way. But then [00:49:00] there’s this, I remember describing it as a wall. Between accessing that part and this other part that is wrapped with, with fear, like real fear, paralyzing fear, right? Yet, yet I know that I’m ready.
[00:49:18] Like I, like both of those parts were, were true. When I left the retreat, And just based on coaching that I saw other people get, that I received myself, conversations with these incredible women at your retreat, and hearing people reflect back what they saw of me, right? Like, you know, Teresia, are you kidding me?
[00:49:46] You know, like, like, we need more of you. Um, I felt that the transformation was, ah, you’re in the business of, you’re [00:50:00] trying to get rid of fear and you’re missing that, like, fear is coming along for the ride. And when you were down and out, what happened is the volume of fear in the form of anxiety, in the form of panic was all consuming, right?
[00:50:18] It was like leading and running the show. So the only difference is that you just gotta get fear back down into like the volume it needs to be and not let it run the show. Like this idea that you’re eliminating it is just not true. The full human experience, the full human emotional experience is coming along.
[00:50:45] Your intuition, your strength, and the word for me that I got out of there, remember we had those three words, power was one of them. Like you have this powerful being in you that is going to lead the way. And yeah, you’re going to be [00:51:00] hell of a scared sometimes and that’s okay. Yeah. So it was like, I left there,
[00:51:11] like I left there just. Calm. I left there feeling unafraid to be me. Right. And, um, I just feel that I and again, you know what you experience in a retreat and then the work you need to get out of that. Yeah, but I think it’s just the beginning. Right. But the fact that I even have the feelings in the journals that I journaling that I did as a contrast, I’m able to address this.
[00:51:44] This, this, this. This thing that I am doing that’s stopping me from being out there within my business in the way that I that I can be, you know,
[00:51:55] Jamie: yes, incredible. So as we, as you said, the retreat was [00:52:00] really to set up 2024. What did it set up? What’s, what are you on the trajectory of now that you went there now?
[00:52:07] I know you’re in the movement, we’re doing coaching. I’m curious, what’s the vision?
[00:52:14] Teresia: So the vision is, of course, there’s, there’s always a financial goal. I think this year, financial goals, typically for me, I always use them against myself. And so what I’m learning more of is You’ve given me language to what, again, I was doing when I was a little child.
[00:52:33] I had this vision of going to the United States at 18, but at 13, you’re not like paralyzed by the idea of applying to college. You’re just like trying to go to high school, you know, or trying to go to middle school, do you know what I’m saying? And you’re focusing on the next step. Yeah. And so what, what I’m, what I’m feeling right now is, all right, we can have these financial goals, but.
[00:52:58] what’s [00:53:00] occupying your mind is your next, next step. That’s what you need to busy yourself doing. Don’t overwhelm yourself by, by everything else. Another piece is doing things. In a way that’s in alignment for me, there are so many ideas, there are people doing so many different things, you know, I hate social media, but I need to figure out a way of doing it in a way that feels good to me, you know, and the frequency of posting and the method of posting will have to be in a way that’s okay for me.
[00:53:33] And I trust that that will work. Yeah.
[00:53:37] Jamie: Yeah, I love it. So good. The next, I mean, this is so great for everyone thinking about instead of just like jumping to some crazy financial goals, like what is the next step? And how can I do it in a way that’s aligned for me? If you, I mean, those two things, it’s, it’s a journey.
[00:53:57] Game changer. So I’m so excited to see how [00:54:00] that unfolds and see the evolution of that. Cause again, like this was just a month ago that we had the retreat. Um, but I was so excited to talk to you because you came in and just. Blew everyone away. I mean, I feel like you just have this calming essence, this wisdom, so much power, so much like it’s the wisdom.
[00:54:19] And I’m like, I just got to have you on the podcast. I want to hear you speak more. So Teresita, how can people find you if they want to work with you, if they want to learn how to tune into their intuition and really get into alignment in their life? How can people find you and work with you?
[00:54:40] Teresia: So find me through Instagram.
[00:54:42] My handle is coachingwithteresia. Um, and, um, I, I do one on one coaching with women. I offer a three month package and we work together. Um, so really the best and fastest way, if you’re interested in working with me, is [00:55:00] find me and DM me and through Instagram at, uh, coachingwithteresia. And then we’ll, we’ll take it from there.
[00:55:06] Jamie: I love it. We’ll definitely link that in the show notes and y’all go follow her. She’s amazing. Thank you so much for being here. And this is just the beginning. And thank you for all of your, your inspiring story. And I feel like there’s just so many amazing nuggets of wisdom within this episode. So thank you very
[00:55:25] Teresia: much.
[00:55:26] Just one thing. Uh, you attract an incredible group of women. I’ve been in a few groups, and I really believe it that your method pulls in really incredible, like incredible people who are kind of in the same place, but not really. And so inspire each other and are doing it so differently that I. It’s inspiring to me.
[00:55:55] I I’m so grateful. I’m, I’m within one of your containers [00:56:00] and I just, I think this manifestation thing, if, if that is what it’s doing, then that’s really the kind of way I want to sort of guide and move through my business too, you know, it’s beautiful to see, yeah. Oh,
[00:56:15] Jamie: thank you. I know it’s one of the greatest blessings of my business.
[00:56:19] I’m obsessed. Obsessed with the humans that are in my world and my community and my programs is, it’s unreal. It’s unbelievable. And it’s been that way since the start. And so, you know, I do think it’s a manifestation come to life for sure. And I think the more that that we tune into our own intuition and show up authentically ourselves where we’re not trying to force something right, where you show to up to business authentically you in a way that feels right for you, you also attract the people.
[00:56:50] That are most like you and that are aligned and it’s just easier and way more natural and I think that’s how I attract the incredible group of women that [00:57:00] I and men and, you know, all genders, but, um, we do have lots of women in our group and they’re incredible. So, yeah, thank you for sharing that. Thank you.
[00:57:12] Thank you.
[00:57:13] Teresia: Thank you for having me.