I struggled with negative body image for YEARS. I hated being overweight. I hated feeling like I had no control over my body or my weight. And I hated having PCOS.
But over time I completely shifted that relationship from dissatisfaction to unconditional love.
And it wasn’t the weight loss that did it. The weight loss was a byproduct of a lot of the work I did around my body image. I began loving my body enough to lose the excess weight.
I thought I’d share the 5 things I did to change my relationship with my body….
- I made the decision that beating myself up was no longer an option.
I didn’t tolerate any of the negative thoughts towards my body anymore. I would quickly catch them and say, “I no longer do this!”
I also quit shaming myself around food, this means I wouldn’t allow myself to be hard on myself about past food choices. Instead, I decided to get curious about them. I’d ask myself things like, “what was the feeling that drove me to eat that?” Then, “what was the thought that caused the feeling?” I began to understand my patterns and learn from the experience rather than just shaming myself.
- I began following through with my commitments to myself, specifically around my food plan.
I know this may sound like it has nothing to do with body image. But here’s the thing I realized. It wasn’t actually my body that I hated, it was that I felt like I had no control over my body or my weight. This is because I felt like I couldn’t control myself when it came to food. I hated that I couldn’t stick to a diet or plan. Once I began seeing that following through with your commitments to yourself builds self-esteem and self-confidence, I made it a priority. I also made my food plans doable—something I knew I could follow through with no matter what. I didn’t make them restrictive like I had in the past. It changed SO MUCH for me!!
- I focused on the things I liked about my appearance.
Every day I would look in the mirror and appreciate my eyes and my hair. Those were the two things that were easy to like. Slowly I began moving to other things, like my freckles, my height, my healthy nails. As time went on, I started seeing the beauty in myself all over. As you know, what you focus on grows! So if you are focusing on what you don’t like, that’ll grow. If you focus on what you do like…that will… and it did!
- I began dressing as the person I wanted to become.
I used to be such a gym nut (because I thought that’s how I’d lose weight), which took a lot of time. By the time I’d get home, I felt like I had business to get to. Getting ready felt like a waste of time since I worked from home. I’d wear my workout clothes most of the day until I got to the shower somewhere between the afternoon and night. I cringe just thinking about this because I remember the way I always felt—messy and kinda gross. I’d have my hair up in a greasy, messy bun, minimal makeup on, tennis shoes… I was definitely dressing the way I felt internally.
After having this realization, I made the decision that I was going to start dressing as the person I wanted to become. I wanted to be fashionable, professional, and pretty. So I began doing my makeup every day like I did back when I was a makeup artist. I put my little corner lashes on, curled my hair, and dressed up as if I was going into work for a high-end company. I can’t even tell you the impact this has made on the way I see myself. It changed things energetically. I felt put together, I felt clean, and I felt more creative. I can’t recommend this practice enough!
- I ran models on the beliefs I had about my body.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about by “models,” check out this blog post HERE. Every time I had a negative thought about myself or my body, I put it in the “T” line of the model to see what result the thought was creating for me. As I began to clearly see that none of those thoughts were producing positive results in my life, I began to question them and let them go, while consciously choosing new thoughts that would create the results I want. It’s been an incredibly powerful practice for me, that I continue to do on a daily basis.
If you’ve been struggling with your body image, know that you are not alone, and you can choose to change it. All it takes is the intention and focus to do so. It is for sure, work worth doing.
If this is something you want for yourself, sign up for your first complimentary coaching call with me, and I’ll be happy to support you!
In health & happiness,
Jamie
