If you’ve been following along this week, you’ve learned quite a bit about what it takes to form new habits—i.e. New Year’s Resolutions. I wrote about the power of easing your way in and taking consistent baby steps. I also shared the importance of planning and scheduling your new habit into your life. And I saved the best for last!
So here it is…Reason #3 as to why you haven’t been able to stick to your New Year’s Resolution….
YOU EXPECTED IT TO BE EASY!
This is literally the number one reason that people give up on their goals. There is SO much I could discuss around this, but I’ll try to sum it up for you here.
Change is NEVER easy and NEVER all that comfortable. Anytime we’re forming new habits, the brain gets confused and will find any excuse to stick with the norm. And the problem is, most people give up the second that discomfort comes in.
So how do we work through this? First thing, we must be willing to feel the feelings of discomfort. We have to say, “this feels like sh*t, but I’m doing it anyway because it’s part of my plan.” Our bad habits form because we’ve avoided discomfort, so if we want to change them, we must be willing to be uncomfortable. The good news is, it’s only this way in the beginning. Over time, it gets easier and more natural. And at the other end of discomfort, is where true freedom lies.
Sounds simple, right? But wow, when we are in the middle of discomfort it feels AWFUL. And many of us don’t even let it get that far. We’ll avoid it by buffering and doing things like mindless eating, drinking, netflixing, social media scanning… all to take our mind away from whatever uncomfortable feelings are present.
So where do we start? First thing is knowing that it’s probably not going to be comfortable and being ok with that. Being committed no matter what. The second thing is becoming aware of the thoughts that are occurring when you feel the resistance. What are the thoughts that come up when you tell yourself you shouldn’t eat that dessert….are they things like:
“There’s no hope, why try,”
“I suck at this”
“I hate doing this”
“It’s not fair”
“Why me?”
If you can identify the patterned thoughts, you can plan on them coming ahead of time. You also get to choose what you want to do with them. Do you want to believe them and carry on with life the same way you always have? Or do you want to see them simply as thoughts, let them pass, and take action anyway? We ALWAYS have a choice. And this is how we move forward.
I’m wishing you ALL THE BEST for 2018. I hope you’ve enjoyed this series and learned something that you can apply to your own New Year’s Resolutions.
And if you’d like support in taking your goals to the next level—sign up for a free mini-session with me HERE and we’ll talk! I’d love to support you.
With loving,
Jamie
