About the episode:
Today’s podcast episode is going to be a little different because it is a coaching session between me and one of my clients, Crystal. I’ll do this every couple of episodes with the intention to not only help the person that I’m on the call with, but with you, the listener. I believe magical things can happen when we listen to other people getting coached because it allows us to dig deeper and maybe uncover some beliefs that are currently holding us back.
In our conversation, Crystal and I talk about the topic of big money – why she believed big money wasn’t actually for her and how this rooted back to memories she held from her childhood. Money isn’t just for lucky people, it’s for people like Crystal, like you, like me, and (I truly believe) anyone who believes they are the creator of their own money.
Topics discussed:
- Overcoming the belief that it’s too late or will take too much time to earn the big money that you desire for yourself
- Believing that you’re the creator of your money and can energetically control how much you bring in
- Thinking about what created your business outside of time, luck, and effort
- Reframing “big” money as “easy” money
- Recognizing what your beliefs about money mean about your beliefs about yourself and your business
- The work that has to be done with healing your inner child in order to unlock your ability to manifest more money
Resources:
About Crystal:
Crystal, The Parenting Coach is a Certified Life Coach and Canadian homeschooling mother of 4. She combines her background in Psychology with helpful mindset tools, somatic work, and emotional processing to help parents change generational parenting patterns (shame-free and connection-based). She helps make conscious parenting simple and natural. She hosts The Parenting Coach Podcast where she shares helpful parenting tools and guidance every week.
Connect with Crystal:
- Help your kids with emotions, download a custom feelings wheel here
- Find your parenting personality! Take the quiz here
- Podcast
- Instagram: @the.parenting.coach
[00:00:00] Jamie Berman: Hi, crystal, how are you? You, hi. Would you like coaching on today? Okay.
[00:00:07] Crystal Haitsma: So I’m really excited for this because we did a month in the money manifestation movement on big money. Yep. And I was able to under, like, I did a lot of journaling that month and kind of was like, okay, well why does big money feel like this?
So big money to me feels like hard. Okay. Like it takes a long time. Like it takes a lot of effort. And so then as I started to dig into that more, I realized that underneath that belief it was actually like, because it won’t happen. Not just that it’s like hard work or gonna take a long time, but like even if I was able to somehow do enough hard work over time, which I have done a lot of hard work over a long time.
Yeah. That it still wouldn’t. Happen. And I think probably the underlying belief is something like big money isn’t for me. Like if there’s like people that it’s for and people that it’s not for, or something like babies that are born that are like here in this line versus this line or something. And so I know that [00:01:00] logically that doesn’t make sense.
Like I don’t believe that logically, but whenever I think about like large amounts of money, like making, you know, a million dollars or more a year, not just in my business but like in anything in life. Okay. Um, that’s what I think of.
[00:01:14] Jamie Berman: Okay. Yeah. So what is it that you think is so special about a million dollars that, like isn’t attainable or is for some and not others?
[00:01:26] Crystal Haitsma: Um, I think maybe I would’ve had to start like a long time ago, like already known that I wanted that much money or something. Okay. Because like in the beginning, before I did life coaching, we just had kind of like normal lives in a normal house and normal. I mean, I’ve never really had normal aspirations, but like somewhat normal, so I don’t think I really thought about it that much.
So then when I started asking myself like, what do I really want? And it doesn’t even have to be a million, but like I do want more for sure. Yeah. Then I feel like almost like it’s too late. Okay. Like it’s just gonna take so many years if I [00:02:00] started now, and I don’t want it to take so many years and I don’t want it to take so much work.
And so it just feels like unattainable because of the stage. Of my life that I’m in now, and, um, maybe if I’d started my business like 20 years ago or something.
[00:02:12] Jamie Berman: Okay. Because your belief is it takes time. Yeah. So that’s why you’re like, well, if it, your, your belief, like, it’s like you are truly believing that it takes time.
So your brain’s like, well if it takes all this time to make a million dollars, or we’ll just say big money, whatever that is. Yeah. Like, we’ll, had to start really, really, really early.
[00:02:36] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah, for sure. And I think even in like, if I went less than a million, like I’ve thought about like, well, how much money do I really want?
Because I don’t wanna be like a giant c e o running this huge company mm-hmm. And all these different things. And I’m like, well, even like having like a take home of like 300 to 500,000 a year after, um, after all of my other things, I feel like that would be awesome. And even that feels like, well yeah, that’s maybe attainable, but [00:03:00] it’ll take like five to 10 years.
Okay. Yeah. So, or longer or maybe never.
[00:03:05] Jamie Berman: Yeah. Where does that belief come from for you? Like sometimes I like to go into my belief system and check in like, Hmm, I wonder where I picked that up from. Just out of pure curiosity, do you know where you picked up? The belief that it takes time to make big money.
[00:03:20] Crystal Haitsma: Um, yeah, so in my home, um, my dad was a high school teacher and there was eight kids, and my mom was a stay at home mom. And I definitely picked up the belief that money is hard. Like not only like hard to get but then hard to keep also. And, um, And some of like, money isn’t the most important thing. Right.
There’s other important things. Mm-hmm. So we don’t even need to like, it’s okay that we’re never gonna have enough money or something along those
[00:03:46] Jamie Berman: lines. Okay. Yeah. So it makes so much sense, right? Because that’s what you saw. And a lot of our money beliefs we pick up by the time we’re like nine years old, right?
We we’re, our conscious brain isn’t even formed, but we see the world around us, we see what’s going on with whether it’s our [00:04:00] parents or our community or whatever, like whatever we see, we kind of take that in as that’s the truth. And that’s what it’s. So, mm-hmm. It makes sense if you’re a teacher, right?
And that’s your only source of income, that it would take time, and that’s okay. Right? There’s a lot of teachers that save their money over time and end up retiring really, really well. I know several of them, but you’re not a teacher. Yeah. And yeah, it’s not what you want. You don’t want it to take a lot of time.
And it doesn’t have to, so you’re looking at one example, but what I would get curious about is like start focusing on and, and getting curious about have I ever seen anyone who has made a lot of money that hasn’t taken a lot of time? Um,
[00:04:50] Crystal Haitsma: like I wanna millionaires, when you say that, like when you started talking about time and money, I was thinking, yeah, I think I know a lot of people who kind of wait until they’re retired.
Yeah. To [00:05:00] have their money. Do you know what I mean? Totally. And it’s almost like, it’s almost like, it’s not that it’s over then, but like even other families that I know, family members that I know are like, well, when I’m retired then I’ll have all this money. And I’m like, but I don’t, that’s not when I want it.
I mean, of course I want it then too, but like, I want these things sooner than that. Yeah. Um, and I know it’s possible because I’ve seen other people. I think since I’ve been in the life coaching world, I’ve seen it happen in the life coaching world. Um, But I don’t know. But I still think of like, besides life coaching, like it takes a long time to become a doctor or a dentist, or a lawyer or, I don’t know.
All of the, all of the jobs that seem to take to make the most money take the longest time to like attain also.
[00:05:44] Jamie Berman: But you have to also remember Crystal, the the, um, your job isn’t your only channel of making money too. So there are other channels that you can create money through. Right. [00:06:00]
[00:06:00] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. And I do, I think I have known a lot of people who just like happened to be in the right housing market at the right time, right?
Or the right investment. Like we’ve had investments that we didn’t think were gonna do really well, and then all of a sudden they did really well. Right? Um, so, That’s, I do see that those things are possible, but they seem a little bit more like out there, like, okay. Yeah. Every once in a while that might happen, but I think that’s like the more of the luck of it.
Right? It’s like the, every once in a while there’s people that happen to do that, but that’s not like the norm. Okay.
[00:06:31] Jamie Berman: Yeah. And that’s just your thought, that it’s just not the norm. Right. You’re choosing to believe that that’s not normal. It’s not normal. For me, it couldn’t be normal. Maybe it would be a fluke.
Maybe if I hit some luck, then it would happen versus I’m the creator and I can actually create this energetically, which of course, like our brain is like, what are you talking about? That’s not what we learn. How do you like create money through energy. Right? Yeah. Because your brain is [00:07:00] like,
[00:07:00] Crystal Haitsma: no. Yeah, it’s just
[00:07:01] Jamie Berman: luck.
Yeah. It’s luck. It takes time. It takes effort, right? That’s what your brain is just believing. But if you think about it, I mean, think about millionaires in the world. If it took time, if time equaled money, Wouldn’t we all make the same amount of money? Because we all pretty much are like, have, you know, give or take, our lifespans are on average about the same.
Yeah. So why is it that some people are making millions, billions and then others are making minimum wage? Wage? If it’s time that equates how much money is created?
[00:07:42] Crystal Haitsma: Right? Yeah, because I think of like, It’s because they’re just not working enough. But there’s plenty of people that are working probably 12, 14, 16 hours a days.
Yeah. That still aren’t making a lot of money.
[00:07:54] Jamie Berman: Yeah. I think about my past self who like, I think I worked the [00:08:00] hardest when, I mean when I was younger, right? I worked retail, I worked several jobs. I was a babysitter. Like I was starting my business. I was making the least amount of money and working the hardest ’cause I was making a minimum wage.
Yeah. So it just. We just like, we wanna look at that. Is it effort and is it time that creates money? Because if it were, I would’ve been rich. ’cause I have worked a lot in my life. I started when I was 11. I’m not kidding.
[00:08:28] Crystal Haitsma: I did too. I had like a paper route when I was like 10. And then I started babysitting when I was 11.
And I worked, I always worked. I worked at Tim Horton’s, I worked at, I worked three waitressing jobs. I was constantly working when I was a youth and definitely didn’t make big money.
[00:08:44] Jamie Berman: Yeah. So interesting. But your brain is still kind of committed to believing that it’s the amount of time or effort you put in.
But what I would get curious is, hmm, if that’s maybe not the case, I wonder what it might be like. What is it that allows some people to [00:09:00] create a billion dollars in this lifetime? Well, others don’t live off of much. It’s like, what? What’s the
[00:09:07] Crystal Haitsma: difference? Yeah, and I think that’s when my brain goes back to like, oh, well then it must just be luck.
It must just be like that baby machine where when babies are born, it’s like here’s, this is one section and this is another section, and so big money must not be for me, or I would already have it.
[00:09:24] Jamie Berman: Mm-hmm. Why would you have it?
[00:09:27] Crystal Haitsma: Because I’ve put in a lot of time, not effort for, well,
[00:09:30] Jamie Berman: see that’s the thing is your brain is still equating it to time, but it’s obvious it’s not time.
So that’s what we’re like, let’s just release that. Let’s. Like are you open to getting curious and just being like, what if I release that belief? Just for this session, just while we’re exploring. Okay. Would it be okay to set that belief on the side? Because I’m kind of seeing that’s not actually true, that it hasn’t been my effort and it hasn’t been my time.
If I put that on the side, if we were [00:10:00] like just if it was like proven that that’s not even it. Okay. And it’s not luck. Let’s put that on the side too. Then what might it be?
[00:10:17] Crystal Haitsma: Ooh, I don’t even know. I’m trying to think about like my business and how I’ve made money in my business. If it wasn’t time or luck or effort,
what created it? I mean, definitely having like connections with people. And definitely putting value in the world for sure. And probably energy, like my own energy, um, that other people are connected to. Um,
[00:10:48] Jamie Berman: I’m gonna take this on. Yeah, right. Just to look at this. I wanna take, ’cause your, your niche is working with parents, right?
So like, imagine a parent came to you and said, well, a good relationship with kids and [00:11:00] conscious parenting is something that like you either have or you don’t. Right. It’s just for lucky people. Yeah. What would you say, like what creates that? Because it’s gonna be the same thing that creates that, that creates money.
So what is it that creates, okay, so a great relationship with your children or, you know, it’s actually not time.
[00:11:20] Crystal Haitsma: I tell people that all the time. I’m like, it’s not how much time you spend with your kids. Um, I think it is like connection. It’s the connection that you have with them and the energy that you’re putting into that relationship and also to the relationship with yourself.
Okay. And as you start to like heal the relationship with yourself and with your kids, it doesn’t have anything to do with the time. Like I could spend no time with my kids that day and still have a great relationship with my kids. Interesting. Yeah. Okay. But not money. That’s only relationships.
[00:11:53] Jamie Berman: Because, right.
But ’cause your brain is just committed to thinking that time and effort creates money. But it’s almost like you’d be [00:12:00] arguing that it’s time and effort that creates a good relationship. What would you say to someone who, yeah. Which it
[00:12:05] Crystal Haitsma: totally isn’t like I work with people for like 12 weeks or less and even in way less than 12 weeks, they’ve changed their relationship with their kids.
Like it really isn’t the amount of time or hard work that gets there. Yes,
[00:12:16] Jamie Berman: yes. So our relationship with money is, I mean, it literally responds in the same way that like money responds to us in the same way. A relationship with a human response, right? It’s all about the way that we think about it, the way that we feel about it, the way we treat it and behave with it.
Same with our businesses. Like, it’s like it responds, it’s like its own energy and it responds to us the same way a relationship does. Like a human. Yeah.
[00:12:52] Crystal Haitsma: So yeah, that’s interesting because I tell people, instead of trying to spend more time with your kids, it’s noticing what are your thoughts and your feelings about you and your [00:13:00] parenting and your children, and if you were to spend that amount of time on that, it would actually be a lot more effective than like more time.
[00:13:06] Jamie Berman: Yeah. So if you were to transfer that with your. With your relationship
[00:13:12] Crystal Haitsma: with money you have of time doing that with big money. Like I’ve done that with money at some, like at on some level for sure. Yep. Where I’m like comfortable with it and feel like I’m good with money now, more so than in the past. But I don’t think I’ve necessarily done that with my relationship with like bigger amounts of money.
Okay.
[00:13:30] Jamie Berman: Yeah. And that’s the opportunity. Yeah. So, where do you think, tell
[00:13:37] Crystal Haitsma: me, tell me what your thoughts are about your big money then. What are you like now? What are your thoughts about it?
[00:13:44] Jamie Berman: Well, My thoughts about big money? I don’t know. Uh, that’s a good question. I, I don’t think of it as big money, so that’s the first thing.
I’m not like, it’s this big scary thing. It’s just like neutral. It’s just like, it’s money. And I, [00:14:00] I imagine myself as magnetic to it. Money just keeps coming in, but I don’t really see it as big money. Oh, that’s so, I don’t see it as something that’s unattainable.
[00:14:10] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah, because I feel like with big then it’s like this big scary goal.
Like I hated the idea of like impossible goals. ’cause I was just like, well then it’s always impossible. Like why would you Or even like 75 hard. I’m like, why would you call it 75 hard? Like nobody’s gonna accomplish it. Yes.
[00:14:23] Jamie Berman: Call it 75 easy. Right? I love that. So what if it’s like easy money and it just happens to be a million dollars?
[00:14:33] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. Yeah. I actually think that, that’s so funny. ’cause I’ve been doing all of my. All of my brainstorming on big money, like what do I think about big money and who am I with? Big money. And I think that’s been helpful to uncover like where my blocks are. Yeah. But I think one of the blocks might be even just how, what I think big money is like that.
It does seem like a far away kind of bigger, obtainable, unobtainable, scary thing.
[00:14:56] Jamie Berman: Yes. Yes. Because I don’t think [00:15:00] of it differently. I think of manifesting $10, very similar to manifesting a hundred thousand dollars. Or a million dollars when we make it this like big, scary thing. It’s like, Ooh, that’s hard.
That’s, that’s different.
[00:15:18] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. Tell me what comes up for you. And I do feel like I am good at manifesting just like small little amounts of money like that come and I’m just like, oh, look, see, it’s like working. Yeah. And like that amount I feel like isn’t scary, but there’s some number that I do feel like is, and I don’t even know what that number is that I feel like is, is bigger or scary or any or unobtainable.
[00:15:37] Jamie Berman: Okay. What, what number do you think that is? Like what do you believe you could make and then what’s the edge?
[00:15:46] Crystal Haitsma: I don’t even know because I make my money with my husband, and so like if I was the only one and it wasn’t him and his side of our business at all, and it was only me and my side of my business.
Mm-hmm Then like any amount of money seems scary. [00:16:00] Which is so funny ’cause I’ve made money before, but like, I don’t know. Even making like a hundred thousand or 200,000 or 300,000 already seems like big.
[00:16:09] Jamie Berman: What’s scary
[00:16:10] Crystal Haitsma: about it? I think the underlying belief is that it won’t happen, is that I can’t. Okay.
[00:16:18] Jamie Berman: Well if you think about you, I, I’m just wondering ’cause you’re like, it’s scary. That’s different than I can’t Hmm.
[00:16:30] Crystal Haitsma: I think it’s probably more, I can’t, like, I think when I think of like why it’s scary, it’s ’cause like it won’t happen.
[00:16:38] Jamie Berman: Okay. So what’s scary about it then?
[00:16:44] Crystal Haitsma: I guess the failure. Mm,
[00:16:49] Jamie Berman: yeah. Yeah. Tell me more.
[00:16:52] Crystal Haitsma: Um, I think just like wanting it and planning on it and taking the time and effort to like, be [00:17:00] working on my thoughts and feelings about it, and then making like less money than I made last year or not making any money or something.
[00:17:09] Jamie Berman: Hmm. Yeah, because what would, what would you make that mean about you?
[00:17:16] Crystal Haitsma: Hmm. That people didn’t want what I have to offer or that it wasn’t, Valuable or not even that isn’t valuable, but like something about me.
[00:17:28] Jamie Berman: Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So what are you attaching money to? Is it your worth?
[00:17:38] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. I think like, I’m just thinking about like people that I see on Instagram that have like a lot of followers or seem to be making a lot of money that like there must be something about them that I don’t have or something.
Yeah. Which is funny ’cause I’m sure people feel that same way about me also, but in my mind I’m like, okay, no, it’s like that, it’s like not working for me. ’cause I say [00:18:00] the same things that other people say and I’m like, well, I’m not making as much money. I don’t even know how these, how much money these people are making.
This is just my brain thoughts. But, um, yeah, that it’s like, not that people don’t want it from me. Mm-hmm.
[00:18:15] Jamie Berman: So good to recognize that, because that’s probably what you like the opportunity for healing around this. Mm-hmm. Is your thoughts about yourself, because what you’re doing is you’re like, I am scared to even go after $300,000 because if it didn’t happen, it would just prove this belief that I already have about myself and it would sting really hard.
[00:18:42] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. You’re making money. This is also, this is also equivalent to parenting. ’cause I literally, I teach this concept called personalization, which is making your children’s behavior means something about you and like your worth and your value. And I’m like doing the same thing with my business and [00:19:00] money.
[00:19:00] Jamie Berman: Yeah. So you’ve got that connected, which is probably why it feels harder. It doesn’t feel as ease. Useful because we can kind of unconsciously become attached to it. Yeah. If we are making it mean something about us because we really wanna believe this thing about us, and we’re like, Ooh, it would take me making money to really, really solidify that belief about myself.
So then we like go for money because we wanna believe these nice things about ourselves, but you could really just decide to believe those about yourself now. And the truth is that work is so important because. You absolutely can and will grow to 300 K a year, but that belief won’t change if you don’t change it now, like hitting a certain income goal isn’t going to change the way that you think about yourself.
So you’ll get to 300 K and you’ll like, well, there’s [00:20:00] something missing about me until I get to a million then. ’cause there’s other people that make a million, then I can believe people want my stuff.
[00:20:10] Crystal Haitsma: And it’s funny too, because I feel like I’ve done so much of this work in the parenting sphere of like separating myself and my value.
Mm-hmm. And I feel mm-hmm. I just like, love myself no matter how I show up in parenting. Like just literally like 110% every single day. I love myself in parenting. Yeah. And so I’m like, what? What do I have to do here? Like, I thought I already, I thought I already worked on my relationship with myself, but um, yeah.
But there must be something still kind of connected there about worth and how much money I’m making or how successful I am in my business. Yeah.
[00:20:45] Jamie Berman: Right. And the good thing is when you’ve already done that work on another area, it’s like you can kind of transfer, you know the route. There’s still work to do.
Yeah. Another area. And that’s why like I think it’s amazing. We’re always evolving. There’s always gonna [00:21:00] be the next evolution of us. So it’s just deepening that relationship. It’s not like you don’t have a great relationship with yourself, but it’s like, ooh, this is the next layer, which is me developing the relationship that with myself that I want specifically around business and money.
Mm-hmm. And how I think about myself and how I think about what people want from me. And when you do that work, that’s where making money becomes very easy.
[00:21:33] Crystal Haitsma: I do think it does go down to some sort of belief about like me and other people and my value and how they perceive it and yeah. Yeah, I definitely think there’s like some connection there, which probably I haven’t noticed before.
[00:21:46] Jamie Berman: Yeah. Yes. So let’s just imagine. That like, let’s just pretend for a second that was completely gone. You didn’t have the belief, like it just [00:22:00] dissolved from your consciousness. You didn’t have a belief that like, it’s hard to get people on board or people, I don’t know what exactly is it like people, it’s hard to get people on board or is it, it’s
[00:22:12] Crystal Haitsma: hard to attract people?
No, I think it’s like me and people, like they don’t want it from me. Like there’s something wrong with me or they don’t wanna be around me.
[00:22:19] Jamie Berman: They don’t want it from me. Okay. Let’s say that’s completely dissolved from your consciousness. This thought, they don’t
[00:22:25] Crystal Haitsma: want it from me. Well, no, it’s not true because I get messages from people being like, your podcast is so helpful.
Like, right. Thank you so much for putting this out there. So I don’t think they think that, I think I probably think that about me.
[00:22:38] Jamie Berman: Right? No, for sure. They don’t think that it’s just something that’s like, it’s a thought in your brain. Is it more around connected to money? Like they don’t wanna pay for it?
[00:22:51] Crystal Haitsma: I don’t know if it’s that they don’t wanna pay for it or they just like, don’t wanna be around me. Like, it almost feels like a little child at the playground. Like they don’t wanna play with [00:23:00] me. Like, you know, like it’s just, it’s something about me because I’m saying the same message that other people are seeing and I know that I help people through the transformation that they want, but I think it is something like, I don’t.
Think it’s that. I think it’s like something deeper about me.
[00:23:19] Jamie Berman: Yeah. Yeah. Probably is your inner child.
[00:23:23] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. I’m like, well, the thought that keeps coming up is like, they don’t wanna play with me. Yeah. And I’m like, even though that doesn’t seem connected to money, but Yeah.
[00:23:33] Jamie Berman: What would your, I’m just curious, like what age do you think that that version of you is that’s saying that?
If you were to touch on
[00:23:43] Crystal Haitsma: on that, I feel like, oh, I don’t know why I’m getting so teary about this, but I feel like I was, it feels like it goes back to like seven ish. Yeah. And it literally does feel like on the playground or something, like somewhere outdoors. Yeah. Where I must have had some experience, I guess, that it [00:24:00] made me feel that way.
Yes. And like they wanna play with other people and be around other people,
[00:24:07] Jamie Berman: and that seven year old just hasn’t been healed yet. Yeah. So you’re just still carrying her with you? Right. And she’s still talking and she’s like, there’s still people that don’t wanna play with you. They don’t wanna be around you.
There’s something wrong. It’s a seven-year-old talking. Yeah. If you could go back in time, if you could go back in time and talk to that seven year old, what would you wanna tell her?
[00:24:37] Crystal Haitsma: Oh. Just how amazing and wonderful she is, and that other people just have their own things going on, that it’s not about her. Yeah. And that she’s just like full of magic. Yes.
[00:24:53] Jamie Berman: Yeah.
That’s what she needs to know. [00:25:00] Yep. She just hasn’t heard it yet.
And that might be something you wanna continue to remind her of ’cause she’s gonna be with with you. Mm-hmm. What’s magic about her?
[00:25:18] Crystal Haitsma: Just everything. I think that little children are just magical. Like I look at my seven year old. Yeah. And she just like dances and doesn’t care what people think about her.
She doesn’t, she just says whatever she wants to say and runs around and plays and literally just dances like on the beach, like so carefree. That’s not
what’s
[00:25:40] Jamie Berman: magical about, about your seven year old. You. I, hmm.
[00:25:48] Crystal Haitsma: I think that she’s just so full of wisdom, kindness, love, like her own inner magic. [00:26:00] Yeah. She’s just like perfect and whole and that’s why
[00:26:05] Jamie Berman: people love you.
Yeah. I think it’s time to start seeing that within yourself. I.
And just start reminding yourself
[00:26:18] Crystal Haitsma: some inner child work. And I’m like, no, I, I’ve healed my inner child. Apparently it’s a lifelong process of, like, I tell people there’ll be things that pop up all the time, right? No. Yeah, I think it is. ’cause it’s not just money, it’s like the amount of followers, the amount of things on my email list or like, I don’t know, just all the little like numbers Yeah.
Mean that people don’t want what I have to offer. But I think the deeper belief definitely is like, they don’t wanna, they don’t wanna play with me apparently. Yes.
[00:26:48] Jamie Berman: Yes. So I think that’s the opportunity for healing here. Mm-hmm. That’s it is to start recognizing your [00:27:00] magic and start recognizing the magic in that seven year old and acknowledging that that’s still in you.
That magic is there, and start acknowledging that like daily, like what is special about me? That would be a great question to ask yourself like daily, what is special about me? And then to start looking for evidence of how people are totally magnetized to you. Like people wanna be around you and start get, like I would start in your evidence journal looking for evidence of that every day.
[00:27:38] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. And I think like one of the questions you had asked was like, what if you didn’t have that belief anymore? And like if I didn’t have this belief that people didn’t wanna be around me or whatever, and I didn’t have a belief about money being connected to. Myself. Yeah. Then I just don’t think I would care so much about money.
Like, not that I wouldn’t be going after goals, but like, it just doesn’t feel like it would have [00:28:00] so much of a, an attachment, like how much money I made in that month. Would it matter ever? Yeah.
[00:28:06] Jamie Berman: What do you think would happen? If you had no attachment to it, like if it didn’t, of course you’re, you have the desire and you’re, you’re gonna be creating it, but it didn’t mean anything about you.
You really let go of that and you saw the magic in yourself and you started to, you really released that belief that people don’t want to be around you, and you let go of that, tie, that connection to. You know, money meaning something about you and you released that you didn’t care as much. What would be different in your business?
Like how would you approach it differently or how would you approach money differently?
[00:28:40] Crystal Haitsma: Well, I have a new program that I’m just launching right away, like in a week or so. And I think I have tied a lot of like, I think it feels heavy, like when I think about selling it or talking about it, and I don’t think it would feel heavy.
I think it would just be like, like I actually think I would talk about it more than I am right now. [00:29:00] And I think I would talk about it more boldly because I think part of it is just like, what if they like don’t like it or disagree with me or something, you know? But if I was just like completely detached from that, I think I would be a lot more bold in how I speak about it and just like messaging people about it and not feeling like I was like bothering them, right?
Yeah. But like this is, you know, this is what I have to offer or something, and not feeling so tied to. The result that people
[00:29:31] Jamie Berman: come purchase it isn’t that fascinating because what do you think would happen if you approached it from that way and you really released that belief? Like what do you think would be different?
Uh,
[00:29:42] Crystal Haitsma: well I joined your program, not because I thought the information was awesome, but because of the energy. Like I was like, I know that this is the energy that I need to create more money and. Like it didn’t have anything. Like, I don’t even know if I knew what your program was offering when I was like, yep, I’m gonna do it.[00:30:00]
Which is so funny because I, and I remember going to one of the first few calls with you and I didn’t even say that, but somebody else vocalized that they were just like, I just needed, knew that this is like the energy, like I just needed this energy. And I just thought, yeah, they bought it because of your energy, not because of, We don’t even care.
We’re like, oh, when are we meeting? Okay, cool. And, um, yeah, I think it would be more like that. Like it would just be them connected to like, that’s the energy that I want with that specific, you know, parenting issue or whatever. And yes, they wouldn’t care how it was being, you know, I’m always, always like thinking about like how many calls and what, how, what layout and like, you know, all of the details of it.
But I don’t think it would matter so much about that.
[00:30:45] Jamie Berman: I. Yes. Yes. Because when your energy is healed within yourself, like people can feel that, right? Like when you, ’cause when I, I really think when we have this belief, like no one wants to be around me, we, we kind of like [00:31:00] block ourselves because of the way that we show up when we’re believing that.
But when you stop believing that, you get to let all of your light and magic out, which, oh my god, crystal, you have so much. You have so much of that. I mean, we all do, but you have so you’re so gifted and there’s so much to share. And I think as you let go of that, it’s just gonna be unleashed in a, like a whole new level.
I can see it. Yeah, I can see it. Thank you. You got it. I’m so excited for you. So thank you so much. I’m curious. Yes. What is there like a practice that you wanna do or something that is coming to mind that you think would be helpful to lean into for this month? I.
[00:31:47] Crystal Haitsma: Yeah. So, um, I’m in a course right now where we’re learning hypnotherapy, so I definitely think I’m gonna do a, an inner child hypnotherapy on myself.
About one of those. Yeah. Um, but I think, I [00:32:00] think in the morning, like right now I do meditation, visualization, and like thought work journaling. And so I think I wanna do it around this, like how to detach myself from that. ’cause I feel like. I always use the word enmeshed when we’re like connected to our, you know, that relationship with our kids.
So I think it’s like discovering that, like what is that enmeshment there and what am I making it mean about me and how can I separate that so much? And then working on those, on those beliefs about myself, those like deep down, like I am full of magic and light and wonder and all of that, all of the beliefs that I wish I could have told.
That little seven year old self. Yes. Whenever I cry, I know that it’s the belief. I’m like, oh yeah, we got there.
[00:32:40] Jamie Berman: Yes. So good. I’m so excited for you, crystal. It’s gonna be a game changer. Oh. And it’s just filled with so much love. I love it. And you’ve done it in one area of your life, so you can absolutely do it in another.
So good. You got the path. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you, crystal. Thank. Can’t wait to see you fly[00:33:00]
all.