How To Talk About Money & Manifestation With Our Partner With Maggie Reyes

Jamie: [00:00:00] Everyone, I have a treat for you today. I have. My personal one-on-one coach that I love deeply. I’m so excited to have her on the podcast today because she happens to be not only a one-on-one life coach for leaders and high achievers, but she’s also an amazing relationship. Expert. And so I wanted to have her on because I know there’s so many questions that I get for those of you listening and those of you in my community around how do we navigate money in partnership, how do we navigate manifestation in partnership?

So I am bringing you the best today, Maggie Reyes. And. She is going to answer your questions and we’re gonna dive into this topic. So welcome Maggie. So happy to have 

Maggie: you. Thank you for having me. I am so excited to be here. It’s an honor to be on the podcast. It’s an [00:01:00] honor to be your coach, so thank you for all of it.

Jamie: I have to tell you something really synchronistic that I didn’t even notice until today. It is my nine year wedding anniversary. And how synchronistic that we are talking about marriage and partnership and manifestation, because I mean, such a significant day to talk about that sounds, that’s amazing.

Divine 

Maggie: happy anniversary. It’s like your manifesting even like, just like more growth, more connection, more love. It’s like totally. I don’t know. It’s kinda like automatic pilot manifesting a little bit like when you get into the flow, when you get into the vortex and you’re just like, my general intention is for goodness and connection, and then a hundred percent 

Jamie: yes.

My thought actually about my relationship in every anniversary that we hit is that. It just keeps getting better and better each year, and our love keeps growing [00:02:00] stronger and deeper every single year, and it’s a hundred percent manifested every year that that’s been the case. And we were talking about it today, and it’s just like.

Wow, nine years ago the place that we were in is so different. We were, our life was amazing, but wow, is it just like even better nine years later? So anyways, so fun. ’cause we practice all this work together and I’m excited to talk you, to talk with you about it because I think listeners are wondering how do you navigate that, right?

Yeah. Where maybe you’re not on the same page and stuff like that. So. Let’s dive in. I think the first thing we really wanna talk about is that soul-centered communication and how do we have those money conversations, because I know that’s a challenge for so many people, especially when you come from different backgrounds, when you have different triggers around money, when you have different views and perspectives coming together and.

[00:03:00] Merging that and asking how do we create a financial reality together when there’s differences can be interesting to navigate. It can be a big opportunity for growth. So I’d love to hear a little bit about how you work with people around that and what perspectives you have on it. 

Maggie: I love this question.

So because I coach people, so like you said, I, I coach leaders who often have. Teams and communities and people that they’re in relationship with. Right. Raising your hand if you can’t see it. And then I coach on marriage, which is also obviously like our most intimate relationship. And then how do we work through it?

And in any of those scenarios, communication becomes a cornerstone of how we get things done. And I like to remind people that our entire life happens inside of a conversation. Yeah. Our entire life. Even a legal contract that you sign, it’s just a written conversation. I’m agreeing to this. You’re agreeing to that.

Here’s what we’re doing. So when you take the perspective that everything in your life happens inside of a [00:04:00] conversation and getting really good at conversations, wow. It’s a really good idea. 

Jamie: Yeah, I mean, right there. Just mic drop. This is why I love Maggie. You guys like everything she says. I honestly, and it’s so funny because I wasn’t looking for like someone who specialized in relationships.

That wasn’t the area of my life that I felt like I wanted to get most of my coaching on. But every time I saw Maggie coach, I’d be like, mic drop. Oh my gosh, you can apply this to so many areas. Never ever thought about that. And it’s so true. ’cause whether that’s relationship with yourself and conversation with yourself or in life.

So yeah. 

Maggie: Yeah. Yeah. So even, even in money manifesting, right? It’s what is our conversation about money to money with money? What is our conversation about manifestation or creation or what our, where our powerfulness lies? Yeah. Like we’re in relationship with these things and we’re in conversation with these things.

So based on that, I uh, developed a framework called Soul-centered Communication, which is what I teach. Now, and we’re gonna talk about it in relation to money. And [00:05:00] the, the thing that’s, that soul-centered communication allows us to do the, the tool that it’s, the purpose of the tool is to allow us to have what I call connected conversations.

Jamie: Okay. 

Maggie: And connected conversations have three elements. Your connected to yourself. To your inner power, to your resourcefulness, to your magnificence. There is, think about those times when we know we’ve been disconnected from ourselves, right? Yeah. Where we just, we’re not there for ourselves. So in a connected conversation, you’re connected to yourself, you’re connected to your positive regard for the other person.

Yeah. So whether it’s your boss, your partner, your cousin, your friend, you’re connected to them. In your positive regard about them. 

Jamie: Mm-hmm. You’re 

Maggie: not connected to, they’re so annoying and this is a problem. You’re connected to the highest and best part of them, and you’re connected to the purpose of the conversation.

You’re connected to why we’re here today. Right. So any problem we have in [00:06:00] life, if we look back, there’s some disconnection. Okay. In our conversations. Yeah. Right. And even if you think about money manifesting, which I know is like our favorite topic, that’s why we listen to this podcast. It’s like, oh, where am I disconnected from?

How I think about money, my, my relationship with money? Yeah. Where am I disconnected from? Like my power to manifest or to create. Yeah. And then what we, what my whole life, it’s like where do we look for the connection? How do we cultivate the connection? Where is it already present? How can we harness that?

Yes. Instead of making a new one. Right. Can we. Use the one we already have. So, social subject communication. I’m gonna briefly tell you the steps and I’ll tell you my tip for like, how to think about it through the lens of money and many conversations with our partner people that we love. So there’s four steps.

It’s to be solution focused. Open-hearted, open-minded, open to new ideas. Uh, solution focus is just to keep your eye on what you want, not on the problem. Hmm. [00:07:00] 

Jamie: Sounds interest. Sounds like manifestation. 

Maggie: Manifestation. I love it 

Jamie: a hundred 

Maggie: percent. Um, I always think that truth with a capital T Yeah. Is gonna be the same.

Totally. And we just use, use different words and we describe it differently, but it’s always gonna lead us to the same place. So solution focused. What do I want in this conversation? What is the goal here? Open hearted. Am I willing to consider somebody else’s point of view if I’m not, we have strategies for that.

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: Um, uncomplicated. Okay. Uncomplicated means one thing I. One thing only. Yeah. And then the next thing. 

Jamie: Mm-hmm. 

Maggie: Another thing that blocks our manifestations is we get really complicated with what they have to look like and how they have to be and what, you know. Yeah. All of these details that then don’t allow the universe to come in and fill in the details in the way that’s best for us.

Jamie: Right. 

Maggie: So it’s, here’s a, just a direct line. It’s like, how can I make the thing that I’m wanting to manifest or work on? Uncomplicated. 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: And then loving So soul, SOUL. Solution focused, open-hearted, [00:08:00] uncomplicated, and loving. Loving is, am I loving and respecting myself equally as the other person? 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: So tell me, Jamie, if this has happened to you.

Many, many, many of my clients prioritize everyone and everything else. Yeah. Leave themselves either for last or not even on the list. 

Jamie: Totally. 

Maggie: So you’re having a conversation with someone about can you bake 54 bagels for the family? You know, picnic? Sure, I can. Right. But if I included myself, I’d be like, oh, I’m in the middle of a launch and I have yes, clients coming live to my house and 54 Bagel right now.

Best idea. A hundred 

Jamie: percent. A hundred percent, yes. 

Maggie: So, so the loving part is, am I including myself? Am I loving myself? As I listen, as I agree or disagree, as I ask questions, it’s just the most basic version is I including myself. So that’s the soul part. Yep. Then the centered part is a soul-centered communication, [00:09:00] soul-centered, connected conversation does not happen inside of a stress cycle.

Jamie: Hmm. 

Maggie: So a stress cycles fight, flight, freeze, appease, we’re activated in some way. Totally. We don’t have access to our best resourcefulness, to our best creativity, to our best. All the things that we want. 

Jamie: Yeah. So if you’re triggered around this topic or around money, or if you’re coming at it already triggered.

Yeah, that’s probably what we wanna address first, then, right? Yeah. Okay. It’s 

Maggie: like, so then with social communication, if we don’t wanna have ’em inside stress cycles, then the question is, how do we not be in the stress cycle? Right? Like a hundred percent. Yep. And then the answer is, we learn the term psychological safety.

Just, hello everyone. Welcome to your former HR Now life coach friend. Um, so I used to work in hr. And in HR we’d talk about this term called psychological safety. And Google did some amazing research with all their teams and a ginormous company, and they found the surprise of no [00:10:00] one, that the safer you feel, the more creative you are.

And the more that their managers and leaders could cultivate this idea of psychological safety, the more productive they were, the more money they made, the more projects they completed. Like everything got better when you did that. Yeah. And so my little HR nerd self read about this. I’m like, well, what about in a marriage?

What about in a relationship? I bet you if we had more psychological safety, everything would go better. Right? And so that’s what we wanna cultivate when we’re having conversations around money, when we have different. Mindsets about manifestation when Yep. Somebody maybe loves manifestation and someone else just doesn’t have the same set of thoughts Totally about it.

Okay. Yeah. How do we make it safe to talk about? 

Jamie: Ooh. Yeah. Could you offer any guidance on that? Yes, because. I think that is probably the key for so many people is to start there. Because once we’re activated, the whole slowing down. Yeah. Understanding [00:11:00] their perspective, adding our perspective in. Yes. It’s so much harder.

Like you said, it’s impossible to go to that sole place. Yes. So it, let’s just say somebody we’re having a conversation with a partner around budgeting and they have two different perspectives and you start. Getting triggered, right? Yes. Whatever way that is. Fight, flight, freeze, whatever it is for you. You just notice that you’re shutting down.

Yeah. Do you have any advice for the person that’s in that place and thinks that people could start practicing when communicating around money? I have so much advice. This podcast 

Maggie: could take 10 hours, so I’m just going to give you like 1%. Yep. Where do we begin? Okay, so the first thing is to recognize it’s happening.

Okay? So we want to, most of us walking around the world having these reactions, but they’re unconscious and we don’t even know we’re having them for ourselves. We don’t know we’re having them, for sure. And then we are talking to someone and they’re visibly upset or retreat. So step one is [00:12:00] to have what I call stress cycle awareness, which is just a, we have stress cycles.

Yep. And B, I can see it in the other person. So. If, if you’re talking to someone and they raise their voice or they use aggressive language, we can recognize what fight looks like. Yep. Right. If you’re talking to someone and they keep going in circles, like have, we’ve all had these conversations where we’re just going in circles with someone Totally.

And a conversation that means it’s frozen. That is the freeze response.

And we’ve all had that experience. So everybody listening, think about that for a sec. You’ve all experienced that, but we didn’t have the labeling to call it freeze. And just having the awareness that’s telling you that that other person is in a stress cycle and they’re not thinking clearly and they’re not gonna make their best decisions.

And then we can decide, should we keep talking, should be step away, should we reschedule? So. Just having the awareness to label what’s happening then gives you choices on what you wanna [00:13:00] do next. Yeah. So that’s so important. So freeze. So we did fight. Flight is when you change the topic, when you pick up your phone, when you look somewhere else.

If you’re a social, pick up Instagram. Pick up Instagram. We’ve all done it. Yeah, we’ve all done it. We’re in a social situation and somebody starts looking for other people. Mm-hmm. They’re flying away from the conversation is what they’re doing. Yeah. And it’s just good to know that that means something.

Stressed ’em out. It may not have been anything you said. They may have something on their mind, something else is going on. And then appease is when you say yes to things you’d rather say no to. Yep. And for the person you’re talking to, notice if they agreed too quickly. Hmm. If they agree and you can tell they haven’t thought it through.

Yeah. They haven’t taken it through their own discernment. They’re just like, yeah, yeah, sure, sure, I’ll do that. 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: That person is in a stress response. Yeah. And to give you an example of how this presents in [00:14:00] intimate relationships very often, so I coach women, uh, usually in relationships with men. And they’ll ask their husband to do something.

So let’s all just pretend that our faucet is broken and we’re asking our partner, Hey, could you fix the faucet? Yep. And he has no interest in fixing this faucet, and this is the last thing he’s ever gonna do. Yep. And you come to him and you say, Hey, would you fix the faucet? He’s like, yeah, yeah, totally.

I’ll take care of it tomorrow. You can tell they haven’t thought about it. They haven’t considered their schedule, they haven’t looked at what they have going on tomorrow. Nothing has happened. They are just saying yes. Because they feel emotional danger of some kind. Yeah. Right. They’re having an activation.

Jamie: Yep. Yep. 

Maggie: Here’s the liberatory part of that. When you can see that they’re not lying to you 

Jamie: Mm. Or 

Maggie: discounting you or not caring about you, when you can see that they’re actually just having a stress response. 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: It opens up a whole new level of connection with that person. 

Jamie: Yes, 

Maggie: because something I’ve coached him a lot is [00:15:00] like he says yes, but then he never follows through.

Right? Totally. We all have that friend something totally right? Yep. Oh, they’ve never followed through. So what I want you to know about that person is that person in the moment that they’re saying yes, they believe themselves. 

Jamie: Yep. Okay. They’re 

Maggie: not actually lying to you. Right. They think they’re gonna fix the faucet and they want to.

Right. They wanna, they wanna maybe, maybe, maybe they wanna, right? Yep. But they are not lying to you. They are maybe lying to themselves, but it’s unconscious. Yeah, totally. And then when you can notice that you can, you can slow down the conversation, you can make new choices. You can check in with them. Yeah.

It just gives you. More power and more choice when you can recognize their cycles. So the first step to minimizing or not minimizing ’cause we’re all gonna have them, but to minimizing the impact that they have on us. Yes. 

Jamie: And working with them, right, 

Maggie: and working with them and And flowing with them. Yeah.

Is just to recognize them in the [00:16:00] first huge place. Huge. Yeah. That’s step one. And then cultivating psychological safety. There’s a bunch of different things that you can do. I’ll tell you like my top two or three. One, which I know you’ll, you’ll relate to because we’re both cognitive based coaches. Like the words that we use matter, right?

Yeah. And the words that we use create and inspire feelings and results. So think about how you describe things as a contributor to psychological safety. Mm-hmm. So if, let’s pretend that you’re my boss. 

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: And you come back from vacation. Something happened and you walk in and I tell you there was a catastrophe.

Yeah. Right? And that’s how I start the story. And for the rest of the story, you’re just freaking out. Already activated, right? Already activated. But imagine the same scenario. You walk in from vacation and I’m like, here’s my report, my update. And I say, well, we had a little situation with a client and here’s how I handled it, and here’s what’s next and here’s what we’re gonna do [00:17:00] and here’s what’s pending.

It’s the same scenario. The only difference is they described it as a situation Yeah. Versus a catastrophe. 

Jamie: Ooh, that’s Yeah. Huge. 

Maggie: Huge. Yes. Huge. Huge. And through the lens of just manifestation itself, it’s like how, how are we describing the things we wanna create? Are they big and far away, or are they small and closer to us?

Jamie: Yeah. Could you give an example if you have one of how that might be implemented around money? Yes. What would be some ways of approaching it where maybe it would offer an invitation where it’s more inviting a conversation of curiosity or where we aren’t just automatically saying something that’s gonna.

I don’t wanna say cause a trigger. Mm-hmm. Or, but it’s going to heighten someone’s reaction. Are there? Yeah. Are there simple like offerings 

Maggie: that you have? I gonna tell you one thing I did [00:18:00] last night, I literally did this last night with my husband talking about money. Yeah. Is I love continuing education.

I’d like to invest in a lot. Things. And sometimes I invest in things and sometimes I invest in things that aren’t really expensive at all relative to our budget. Totally. And I’m doing, uh, a training that I’m really excited about and instead of telling him that I’m doing the training and then he could like sit and wonder for the next five minutes.

How much money is this training and freak himself out. Yeah. I was like, I’m doing this very cheap training. It’s super affordable. This is what it costs. Let me tell you all about it next. Right. So I literally did that last night and he was like, oh, this sounds wonderful. You should totally do that training.

Right. Totally. Now what I did was transparency, like the skill or the thing I want everybody to learn and to take away. It’s not the specific words that I used, but it’s how could you be transparent about the thing at hand? Yeah. So I’m gonna give you another [00:19:00] example of using transparency to talk about money.

Yeah. With a partner. Yeah. And it’s one of my favorite, um, I don’t know, coaching wins. You know, we, we sort of like coaches have our coaches sort of greatest hits, like a hundred percent things our clients have done that like blow our mind all the time. Yeah. So this is one of my favorites. So one of my clients wanted to talk to her husband about money.

And they always had different values. Yeah, different value systems around money. So pause here to say, find out your partner’s values around money. Mm-hmm. What are they? Do they think money is security and they, and they want to save as much of it as they can, and the more they save, the more secure they feel.

Yeah. Do they think money is just a conduit for adventure? And the more money they spend, the more adventures they have? Like when you find out their values, then you can frame whatever you’re talking about. With your values and their values in mind. So that’s just another, another way to do it is to think about each other’s values and that creates more psychological safety.

But anyway, so back to transparency. So, [00:20:00] yep, she wanted to invest in something. She wanted talk to her husband about it. And every time in the past that they had talked about sort of big money investments or, or expenses, it was a fight. It would last for weeks. It was a whole drama. So in coaching, what we did was this, we said.

Here’s my hypothesis. The more psychological safety you create, the better it’ll be for you. Yep. So here are, here’s my suggestion. Tell him you want to talk about this thing. When is a good time? Yeah. So transparency, the thing. Yep. And consent. When is a good time? Yep. Consent is always a good idea. Even in our manifestations there, when we want something for somebody else, we always say for their highest good whatever’s for their best.

You know, we don’t know what’s for their best. So like we don’t have their direct consent, so we just send some highest good to them. A hundred percent. Yeah, totally. Okay, so consent. And then, so she did that. She said it’d like to talk about this, when is a good time? And he gave her a date and they put it on the calendar.

And in the past, [00:21:00] what used to happen is he’d walk through the door, maybe after a long day of work, she’d be like, here’s this thing, I wanna spend all these thousands of dollars. And he’d be like, absolutely not. This is terrible. We’re going to, you know, live under a bridge. And then they’d fight about it for a week.

Yeah. So instead of doing that, she said when it was a good time, in that time, she told them what it was in the amount, and he, this man. Made a spreadsheet. So when it came to their time to speak, he said, I’ve looked at our situation and if you wanna do that thing, we can move this around, cancel this, do this other thing next year, and you can have that in two weeks.

This money that you want to do this thing. Yeah, they talked for five minutes. She got what she needed and she was done and they moved on. There was no fight. There was no nothing. That was nothing. That was it. Ah, that’s the power of consent and transparency, and then someone having psychological safety to think on their own, how they wanna approach it.

So he wanted to make sure that they moved [00:22:00] some things around to accommodate for this thing. He thinks a little slower. She thinks a little faster, right? Yeah. Some of our friends or loved ones, we need more time to process. Oh yeah. Less 

Jamie: time to process. Is that normal in couples? I don’t know. That’s me. I’m the fast one.

We always say I am. Definitely the robin. He is, yes. Yeah, 

Maggie: so that, so that example, so for you directly, Jamie? Yeah. When you wanna talk to him about something, you say, I wanna talk to you about this thing. When is a good time? And if there’s anything he needs to consider. Yeah. You can ask him. Would you like to know what I’m gonna ask you to consider so you can think about it a little bit before we talk.

Fantastic. And you give him the opportunity to say yes or no. 

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: And then you talk to him on that day. And then it could be useful, maybe not to expect an answer on that day. Okay. Now that we’ve talked about it. Yeah. Um, I’d love for you to think about it and then when you’ve thought it through, I’d love to talk about it again.

Yep. Creating that space. Just [00:23:00] creating that space to say, I know that I like to move fast, and you’d like to be a little bit more analytical in how you do things. Right. Yep. Um, and honoring that in him also creates psychological safety. 

Jamie: Yes. That’s huge. And like, as you say that, I think that’s probably one of the biggest things, and the one, one of the biggest opportunities for growth is in what I’m hearing, is just really understanding our partner’s way of doing things too, and our partner’s way of being and not making that wrong.

Correct, because I mean, it’s so easy to say, well, this is the way, this is how I do it. This is how I want it done. But what if we consider their way isn’t wrong, it’s just. Different, right. That yes. Whether that’s, you know, like from what I’m hearing too is just understanding their nervous system response.

Yes. Understanding our nervous system response so that we can understand when we, if and when we’re triggered, or if or when they’re triggered and we can [00:24:00] slow the conversation down. So yeah, just understanding their nervous system response. Mm-hmm. And that creates so much awareness. And I think that idea, there’s one thought that I’m even taking away that I’m like, oh my gosh, I wanna bring this into every conversation moving forward.

Is that. There’s no one way to do it, right? Yes. There’s no right way. My way is one way. Their way is one way. How can we come together? So what I’m curious about is how. Is it possible to come together? How do you meet in the middle when you have two completely different opinions or ways of doing this?

Let’s say one person tends to be an avoider of money, another person tends to be quite rigid and on top of it, and anxious and wanting to look at every single thing, and it creates some conflict. Yes. How would you recommend. Even though, let’s say we have awareness that we’re different, how would you recommend coming together [00:25:00] so that you can still thrive in a relationship when there’s two different ways of being two different values, two different triggers?

Maggie: So there’s a couple of things that I would recommend. So the first one is. Where do you overlap? Where do you agree? Where do your values align? How much can you focus on that? 

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: And where do you need to make your own choices as individuals? 

Jamie: Okay. 

Maggie: So when it comes to money, for example, if the values are completely diametrically opposed Yep.

Um, you might have, um, separate bank accounts and a United Bank account. So you might have three bank accounts. Okay. And, and if your values are completely aligned, you might have one bank account, right? Yeah. Like so it could be, oh, we’re never gonna agree on how much to invest. 

Jamie: Yeah. But 

Maggie: we can agree on how much to put in for the mortgage.

And then the other part. It’s gonna do that. And you don’t have to have an opinion about it. I’m just going to do it and I don’t have to have an opinion about whatever, how many comic books you buy or something. Yep. And you can just go and do that. Yeah. [00:26:00] Whatever the thing may be. So one of those things is to look for where you overlap and can unite.

Yep. And to look for where you need to, let’s use a fancy word, individuate. 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: And, and, and make some of those choices now that will have difficult conversations and follow. Okay. Because you might even disagree on that. Yeah. Someone might think we should do everything together and someone might think, well, I don’t wanna do everything together.

Yeah. And that’s where you use these skills of creating as much psychological safety as possible. Yeah. To have that difficult conversation and then remembering that you’re on the same team, say, 

Jamie: okay, if 

Maggie: we were on the same team, how would we solve this? How would we approach this? Yeah, that’s so good. And if you’re, and if you’re in a relationship with someone who cares about you, even if they have different values, they will listen with empathy.

Yeah. To your values. Yeah. And if they don’t, that’s a red flag. 

Jamie: Okay. 

Maggie: Right. Like, we wanna acknowledge that if, if that feels like a completely impossible conversation, that’s a yellow to orange to red, depending on the severity. But that’s a [00:27:00] flag. We gotta, we gotta look at that more deeply. 

Jamie: Yeah. Yeah. 

Maggie: The other thing, so I said there two things.

So the other thing No, 

Jamie: it’s so good. Thank you. 

Maggie: Um, think about this like, like, like what you were saying about how to manage money, but also just the idea like early birds marry night owls and people who like to plan marry the spontaneous person Totally. And slow thinker, yin and the yang, the fast thinker, like all of that, right?

Yep, yep. So there’s amazing research from an institute called the Gottman Institute, and what they have found is that 67%. Problems, I wanna say, I hope I’m saying it correctly, are unsolvable. 

Jamie: Mm-hmm. So 

Maggie: there’s a difference. And I, and when I read this, it blew my mind when I read it, and now I teach about it and talk about it all the time because it blew my mind.

There’s a difference between a problem you solve Yeah. And a problem you manage. So a problem you solve has a clear end date. We paid off the mortgage on the 25th payment. We’re done. It’s complete. Totally. It ended, right? 

Jamie: Yep. Yep. 

Maggie: That’s something you, [00:28:00] it’s solvable. It has a clear, it’s clear solution. Right.

And then, and you’re done. There’s a done point. Yeah. Now, uh, I’ll use myself as an example. I tend to be late. My husband tends to be on time. Over the years, I didn’t even know I, I have some neurodivergence in me. I have some time blindness. Mm-hmm. It’s hard for me to calculate time sometimes. Yeah. But so that is not solvable.

That will never go away for as long as I live. What do we do with that? We need to manage that. And what I see most people do when they have those problems where they’re fighting all the time and they’re not happy and they’re frustrated, is they’re trying to solve something that is inherently unsolvable.

Jamie: My gosh, I. I love it right now. I’m just letting that so in, it’s so good. Yeah. So it’s about managing. 

Maggie: Yes. So it’s about managing, mitigating, preparing for. Whatever the case may be. So if I’m all in on manifestation and I know it [00:29:00] freaks my partner out. Yep. And I wanna manifest some really big, big thing I look for, how can I create safety around it?

Mm-hmm. So if I wanna manifest my dream house, I’ll be like, listen, I’m not gonna do anything crazy. I’m gonna talk to you every step of the way. I am gonna keep you updated on how my manifestations are going. Yep. Here’s what I’m doing. I’m not gonna like risk the family fortune. I’m not gonna sell my car.

You know? So you’re telling the person, okay. There’s some safety here. I’m still going for my big dream. Yeah. And here’s how I am approaching it and what I’m doing. Yeah. And, but it’s really important to me to go for my dream because that’s what lights me up. That’s what gives my life meaning. Right. One of the things that really helps a lot is when we can be vulnerable with the people in our lives.

And, and instead of from a place of like, I got this, but from a place of like, this is why this matters so much to me. Yeah. Then it becomes so much easier for them to access compassion and to sort of be back on your side about it. [00:30:00] Yes. And anything you share about lowering the risk or how you’re mitigating your own risk, that helps them.

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: Yeah. 

Jamie: Wow. So what I’m hearing too is it’s not fighting for what you want. It’s not trying to prove it, it’s not trying to defend it. It’s coming together as if you’re a team and helping them gain perspective around why it’s important to you from a non triggered place. When you are not in your nervous system, you know, you’re, you’re triggered response in communicating.

That’s huge. I love that. Yeah. So I had some really great questions that came in from my community and I would love to ask you, Maggie, let’s so maybes do it. Maybe you could offer some support. So if someone asked if there are some struggles in the relationship. Even when we’re actively working on them, how might those struggles interfere, if at all, with manifesting money or work?

What are some ways to stay focused on the manifestation in [00:31:00] one area while struggling in relationship? 

Maggie: Okay, so, so I wanna hear your thoughts about this too, but my first answer to this is if you let it mess with your vibe. 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: Right. Yeah. If you let it rain on your parade. So we’re on our parade doing our thing.

In our parade, there’s only umbrellas and like magic, litter, dust, rain. That’s it. Yeah. This other thing that’s going on over here. If we let it make our parade cloudy. Yep. That’s how it can interfere with a manifestation. So some of the things that you do is you create a boundary. Maybe you don’t talk to this person about that thing, if that’s one of the triggers in the relationship.

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: Maybe depending on which relationship it is, if it’s someone that you don’t live with, maybe you talk to them less. Maybe you call them less. Maybe you lower the time you’re spending with that person. Yep. Right. So there’s some element of, if you don’t want it to mess with a manifestation or something you’re working on is how is it affecting my vibe, if at all.

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: And then if it is affecting my vibe, what are the boundaries I [00:32:00] need to set with this person so I can still do this thing? So that’s one. Totally. 

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: And then with the struggle and the relationship, what I would say is how can you relate to the highest and best part of them? 

Jamie: Mm-hmm. 

Maggie: And this is tricky, so I’m gonna add the nuance, right?

There’s some relationships that need to end and you need to be really honest with yourself about that. And sometimes that’s hard, which is why people work with coaches and all that stuff. Yep. But, um, from my HR days, I had all kinds of internal clients, right, that I had to, to work with that I couldn’t choose, right?

I just got what I got. And some people really to work with and some people were great to work with and my way of staying in my vibe around that yeah. Was I would look at the person I. And then someone would be like a jerk. They like certified, they’re a jerk. People don’t like them. They’d come up to me, they’d warned me about them in a meeting, whatever, and I’d be like, what is it in this person that I can connect with?

That’s their highest vibe they have [00:33:00] available. Oh, they really care about their team. They care about to everybody else. They care about their team. Oh, they really care about excellence. They’re mean to their team, but it’s because they want the product to be amazing. Yeah. Whatever it is that I could hang on to, that was the highest vibe part of them.

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: That helps. I love that. 

Jamie: I love that. So good. Another thing that’s just interesting to think about as I was thinking about this question is I feel like as humans, we always have an area of our life that we’re. Expanding around growing into maybe have an obstacle that we’re working through because we’re living in the human experience and there’s the obstacles create the growth and they create the expansion.

So for most humans, there’s some area of our life that we’re experiencing some kind of growth edge or some kind of obstacle. And then there’s other areas of our life that are smooth sailing or sometimes we’re even. Experiencing wins in and celebrations and amazing things. So I think [00:34:00] even if you just let go of the idea that.

Every area of my life has to be going amazing and positive. Um, in order to manifest money or to manifest, you know, business growth. That’s just a thought that I would question a hundred percent. 

Maggie: Yes. Yeah. Like the idea that you have to have perfect conditions in order to manifest Yeah. Is the problem, right?

Yeah, totally. So we are, we’re gonna have this human experience the whole time, and in the middle of all this stuff, we’re gonna also manifest. 

Jamie: A hundred percent. I mean, how many people struggle in their marriages and are still thriving at work, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like if you could separate the two, that could be helpful too, of like, oh, this is my growth edge and this is what I’m focusing on over here, but work that gets to be a separate lane.

So yeah. That might be helpful too, to add on an addition, but I love what you’ve shared and I love what you’ve shared about the relationship too. Okay. One or, or, I have a couple more questions. Um, okay. My question would be how to navigate when one [00:35:00] partner likes to plan and talk through options while another partner arrives at the same decision more quickly and ideally talk about it, um, once, unless information has changed.

Right. So I think it just kind of goes back to what we were talking about previously of like when two people have two different approaches. Is there anything else that you’d wanna add onto that? Yes. Acceptance. 

Maggie: Okay. So if you’re the person who likes to think it through, you married a quick thinker. Yeah.

Can you accept that about them? 

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: And what would it look like if you just accepted that? If you’re the person who likes to talk about it once you married someone who’s talked about it six times. Yeah. What if that’s just, I, I like to think about it like a relationship tax, like the tax you pay for being with this amazing person is you gotta listen to it six times.

Yes. It’s not a problem. Yep. That’s so good. So good. 

Jamie: Yeah. That’s it. You know what I also, ’cause I have. I’m in relationship with someone who’s [00:36:00] very different. He’s a much slower thinker. Likes to process things through, likes to take his time. I’m more like, I got the gut instinct. Let’s go. Let’s go do the thing, right?

So like some things I would had to wait like. I don’t, I didn’t have to. I chose to wait years to create safety for him, right? Yes. And so what I look at it as, what is this year to teach me is patience. Like this is my greatest lesson in patience because it’s something I wouldn’t learn if I were just on my own and making gut instincts and moving fast and all of that kind of stuff.

So I’ll add that on too. Love it. Um, yeah. So good. All right. Another question is we. We have all accounts joined and I’m using everything we learn in the movement, but he’s not into manifestation. And sometimes I wonder with it being joined, if it’s both of our relationship with money impacting our accounts.

Any advice for that? 

Maggie: So this is my completely biased advice as a woman in the United States in [00:37:00] 2025. Yeah. Have a separate account. Yeah. Regardless of anything. 

Jamie: Yeah, 

Maggie: is even if you start at zero and you put, you know, a hundred dollars in that account, there’s nothing wrong with having a separate account and letting that be your play money, your manifestation money.

You’re like, only my energy goes into this bucket. Right. Whatever. And I’m saying it for many, many reasons. People forget. That it wasn’t until the seventies that women could have their own bank account. 

Jamie: Totally. 

Maggie: And as, as, just as a protective, I don’t know if the energy is protective, but as someone who’s living in their full sovereignty.

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: If you made all your manifestations dreams come true and became a multimillionaire, you know what would happen is you’d have more than one account. Yeah. So let’s step into having more than one account now. 

Jamie: Yeah. I love it. So 

Maggie: good. 

Jamie: You know, sometimes that can solve a lot. Yeah. Right there. Yeah. So good.

Amazing. Oh, so good. Okay, one more [00:38:00] question is, um, I’m now convinced that trusting the universe, letting go and taking courageous actions. Are enough, but my partner thinks hustle and worry are necessary. Who? So he smiles at me when I tell him how I’m doing this. When he does that, it reinforces the idea that hustle is the way which I’m trying to stop believing.

Then my brain goes to maybe he’s right. Any advice for that? 

Maggie: I have so much advice for that. Okay. Um, it doesn’t reinforce the idea that hustle is the way. Mm-hmm. That is a thought. When he does that, I have the thought that he’s reinforcing that hustle is the way I create things, but I know magic and manifestation and trusting and all of these other things is the way I create things.

Yeah. So all it does is it tells me his opinion about creating things. Yeah. So separating out that it’s like, oh, he has a different filter that he views the world with. He’s walking around the world with his past experiences, [00:39:00] his traumas and moons. His dreams and goals and they’re different than mine and he processes the world differently.

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: When anytime he smiles it, that’s all it means. So the new thing you’re gonna think when he smiles is, oh, he processes the world differently. How lovely for him, yeah. Be. I love it. 

Jamie: I love it. 

Maggie: So in practice, you’re gonna have to think that a thousand times or you’re gonna have to practice thinking that a thousand times when his doubt makes you doubt.

Mm-hmm. That means you were doubting. Yeah. Which is great. It’s not a problem, but it just reveals to you where you’re still wobbly. Because it’s like, I think Jamie is a genius and if somebody came over and told me that she wasn’t a genius, I’d just be like, you must be mistaken. ’cause I know her and I know she’s a genius.

So if he’s like, oh, that’s fine, you create with manifestation and you’re like, I know that that’s real. Yeah. You must be mistaken, but we’re not gonna [00:40:00] argue about it. ’cause we, he can have his own opinion. He’s title. Yeah. Totally. Yep. Um, but it’s like, you must be mistaken. It’s not gonna shake my thought about it at all.

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: You see. 

Jamie: Yes. Yeah. Yes. I love that. And I think while I have you, I wanna ask one more question that I hear so often from my community, which is, especially when someone starts diving into this work and starts growing rapidly, and they start manifesting and they start believing in this, but their partner’s not on board with that, and they’re afraid their partner’s gonna take them down or their partners.

Relationship with money or thoughts about things is because their life is. Together. They’re afraid that’s gonna bring them down and that even their partner’s vibe brings them down. Mm-hmm. Any thoughts on that? Yeah. Any perspectives. When one person believes in manifestation and is doing their work to think intentionally and putting more positive things out into the world, [00:41:00] and then another one isn’t really on board with that, 

Maggie: I think you could still love that person if, if you had other values that were very highly aligned.

Yeah. So there’s nuance to this question. It’s like when you’re worried they’re gonna bring you down. If, if you genuinely have this worry, that usually isn’t the only place you’re disagreeing. 

Jamie: Mm-hmm. 

Maggie: So for everybody listening, you know yourselves, is this the only place where you’re disagreeing, where your values don’t align?

Or are there like six other places where your values don’t align? And this is just the loudest one? So the, the coaching and the guidance would be different depending on it. Totally. But let’s pretend. Yeah. This, this is the perfect partner for you. You’re totally into them. They’re totally into you. This is just this one place where we just don’t.

Really see eye to eye. Okay. So if that’s the case in that scenario, what I would say is you can have conversational boundaries. 

Jamie: Yeah, 

Maggie: you don’t have to talk about your manifestations. That’s what your community is for. That’s literally, you’re in Jamie’s community so that you have a whole group of people [00:42:00] all rowing in the same direction, like working on the same things and you can talk to them and they get it and you don’t even have to explain it.

Jamie: Yep. 

Maggie: So, so you can have conversational boundaries with that person and you can again go back to they filter life differently and that’s okay. Yeah. That’s not a problem. So they can have a different experience, and that’s not a problem. If you’re worried that they’re somehow going to bring you down, then if that person was sitting here with us right now for coaching homework, I would tell them, right, all the ways that they’re gonna bring you down.

What do you mean by this? You’re gonna lose all your money. You’re gonna live under a bridge. What’s gonna happen? It’s gonna kill the vibe, whatever it is, right? All those waves. And then first of all, when you see it in writing, you’re gonna be like, well, that’s not real, because I have control over this one and this one, and this one and this one.

And it’ll start just dissipating on its own. Yeah. So kind of like there’s the nuance of is this the only thing you disagree on For real? 

Jamie: Yeah. 

Maggie: And if, and if it’s [00:43:00] a bunch of things, then we’d have to dig a little deeper. Right? Yeah. That, that, that would be a whole other podcast. That was the one we gonna do today.

Yeah, totally. Um, but that’s the session with Maggie. Yeah. That’s, that’s like, like call me. Yeah. It’s like, but the, but if it’s really like they just don’t get this one thing, then like, my husband is a gamer. Is passionate about gaming and loves gaming and it’s one of his biggest hobbies and passions in life.

And like I love personal development. Like I could listen to Oprah for eight hours. Yep. And these are big, important things in our lives. Yeah. But he’s not gonna do that. Like he came with me, he was so sweet. He came with me. To what Oprah Live meant years ago and pulled out his phone and just started reading his phone.

But he was there with me. Right, right. And he made that effort and he gets all the points for doing that. Totally right. Yep. So we are in that situation where there’s some things I’m much more invested in that he is, yeah. Yep. But I don’t experience that as a problem at all. I ’cause all of our other values [00:44:00] align so well that that’s just a minor thing.

So for everybody who has that issue of like, oh, manifestation is so important to me, is this a problem? If it’s just part of who you are, you don’t have to make it the centerpiece of the thing that tears you apart. 

Jamie: Yeah, 

Maggie: that, that’s optional. You could just say, I love, I value this thing. It’s really important to me.

And how, where do we overlap? Where do we agree? What? What can we share? Coming back 

Jamie: so good. Oh my gosh.

So this was an amazing conversation, Maggie, and I know that listeners. Are going to be interested in following you, learning about you listening to your podcast because I know there’s a lot of listeners that want to learn how to integrate these things into their marriage and create thriving stronger marriages.

Um, and [00:45:00] I wanna add side note, what’s really awesome about you, Maggie, is that you get the stuff that my listeners are here for. Like, one of the reasons that I wanted to work with you is your energy, like, and on top of it. We love all the same teachers. We’ve read all the same books. You’re super into law of attraction, manifestation, and you know how to bring that into relationships and coaching too.

So if somebody wants support, either around their relationships or their team, any kind of relationship in their life. Yeah, where can they come follow you, find you work with you, all the things. 

Maggie: I love it. Okay, so my website is my name, Maggie reyes.com. You can always go there, see what I’m up to. Um, whatever my coaching offerings are, I do private coaching with leaders and executives and business owners, and then I do marriage coaching.

So. Um, those are my sort of two specialties. Before I was a coach, I worked in hr, which is why I have a lot of like work references, which is always helpful too. Yeah, it, it, it helps. Um, [00:46:00] and then you can follow me on Instagram at the Maggie Reyes. I always joke around that Reyes is like Smith for like Latin people, so there’s like a million Maggie Reyes, but I’m the.

Maggie Reyes, please, Maggie Reyes. Go follow her. Um, and then I have a podcast called the Marriage Life Coach Podcast, where I really do focus on all of these things through the lens of long-term relationships. So if that’s something that calls to you, yeah, you can listen to it. And something fun if you’re single and you wanna be in a relationship is you.

Listen to the podcast. Ooh. As one of your manifestation tools of like, these are all the things I’m gonna do and I’m a relationship. ’cause that’s, that’s so good. That’s so 

Jamie: good. A hundred percent. Yes. You will totally manifest your partner. And not only that, but you’ll be totally prepared to be the best partner ever.

That’s the idea. Uh, yes. Everyone go follow. Maggie will absolutely love her. She’s such a bright life and a, a bright light and a brilliant coach. So thank you [00:47:00] for all of your support, Maggie. I love you. Thank you for being my coach, and thank you for being here today, here 

Maggie: today. Thank you. I, it was an honor to be with all of you and thank you.

I love you too. Love you.